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Stags of the Mountains: You in the A Song of Ice and Fire BROB: With a Bonus!

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Post by Psyckosama Wed Oct 01, 2014 3:17 am

Brian Boru wrote:"Well we'll see how that debt gets repaid and at the rate things are going you'll likely be able to do so pretty damn quick if there's more of these more of these morons."

"Don't be a fool, man. At this rate I'll be owing your heir the hand of first born daughter..."

While I keep a predatory grin.

Still grim. These people have lost an uncomfortable about due to those fuckers. They were laughing to forget it.

Well I've hopefully got some capital with them.

You found 50 fucking dragons. do basic math

I clap him on the shoulders and say, "Ah in that case we just need a Hill, Snow, Waters, Sand, Rivers and a Storm and we can be the Seven Bastards, the hardest fighters that ever were or will be.  By the time we're done our names'll be badges of honor!"

He laughs.

 If anyone asks why I left out Pyke I say, "That's for the Iron Born and FUCK the Iron Born, worst pack of Pricks that inappropriately call themselves human beings that ever lived."

d10...

Nervous chuckle.

Smart.

If I get a chance I'll mention that I already made back the armor I spent on.

Yep. And a tidy sum.

Awesome, will need to tell him where he'll need to go to ransom his gear back.

You get a nod and to be honest, the customary amount is waiting for you when you get back.

Seems the King's Guard take this deadly seriously.

Considering the quality of his arms, armor, and steed you're looking at another large amount (mind breaking out the RPG for me?)

Mixed feelings there.  Glad he impressed, upset how he's let himself go, AND for leaving us behind in the Vale.  But he'll see oh yes, they'll all see....

Cool.

Anyways, Draymon and Martyn clean house.

Draymon ends up going head to head with a poor sap of a hedge knight who frankly looked more like a parody of the knight than an actual knight. Shockingly though, the man actually performs rather well. His training is crap, his equipment is worse, and his mount looks like an old nag that's frankly looks like it can barely support his weight. But he actually has a lot of guts and takes a couple blows to take down. With a decent teacher, gear that wasn't ass, and a horse that wouldn't look out of place in a glue factory he might have done something with himself...

Martyn is put up against a knight in decent armor wearing the colors of House Wythers. Probably a sworn sword like himself. It's a pretty short contest. He's obviously the better skilled of the two.

As for young Clyton, he also ends up against a house knight. For him its a harder contest but while his gear isn't quite the match, and his horse not the best fit, he pretty much holds on for dear life. If he looses his arms and armor now, he might as well throw himself into the Rush.

He actually manages to pull a victory but he looks beat.

Ah my half-brother and his mother, you know she'd almost be pretty if she didn't warp her features with all the hate and spite.

Half brother? Don't see a resemblance.

5

This time you get a common knight. Noone as impressive as the king's guard. He's wearing the colors of House Florent. Probably one of your aunts many many cousins.

Anyways, he puts up a damned good fight, but goes down pretty quickly.

The odds were pretty much in your favor at this point so it really wasn't worth betting.

Edd

That actually gets her to bust a gut laughing there.

"I think the Wall is one of those sights everyone should see before they die. It's amazing. Just don't accept anything in black..."

That is a much more pleasant image than it should be he muses out-loud.

"You're a king. If you can't, on occasion, toss someone really sleazy and obnoxious off of the walls of the red keep, then what's the point? Just tell everyone he slipped..." Razz

He takes it to hand, and you actually see him reading the damn thing.

So?

And she is duly impressed, she's never seen someone as big as you move that damn fast.

"It's a gift."

Hah!

That said, if they're cool with it... Wink

Ah, small grating then in your particular serving.

Wild hemlock is a look alike of wild carrot. Little known fact.

She curious about them

She pouts a hair, but agrees.

"I also expect you not to use it on yours. It's a nasty poison. Not one of the ones you commonly play with. You know what I'm talking about."

She would. There are some toxins you don't fuck around with.

She's rivited

It's a cllear liquid that is then bound to a powder. It has faint a small of almond...

"So, would you like to test it? I'm sure there's at least one murderer or rapist in the city who'd accept the mercy of poison over the headman's bloody axe..."

They hit it off shockingly well though Bella's quite nervous.

"Oh, relax... they're good lads and they'll treat you right and properlly...." I raise an eyebrow. "Right?"

They seem to like each other well enough.

They sure have enough in common Smile

I also introduce her to Samwell, who I'm sure will have a lot in common with the most bookish of the snakes. They're also about the same age. Smile

God, that would piss off his father.... Very Happy

He's armed with a narrow rapier, which he uses to incredible effect.  This is the first time you've really been pressed in a long while, the man is GOOD and extremely fast.  You still win but you've got more than a few small cuts where you're skin is exposed.

I salute him with full honor and respect. "Your reputation is well earned. If your blades had their customary toxins, I would be in a sorry condition indeed. Well fought, Ser! Well fought!"

He's VERY impressed, never met a man your age and size move like that, where did you learn?

I point out Ser Martyn. "I'm lucky enough to now have the man who trained me in my service, along with his current squire, Walder..." I nod to the GIANT that is Hodor.

What's next? Anything happen?

Any luck with prince Doran's gout?[/quote]

Psyckosama
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Post by Rieverre Fri Oct 03, 2014 4:52 am

Brian Boru wrote:That and biology is a killer, You might be a super soldier but Mya's still a scion of the blood of the Storm Kings, it's going to tell.

True, but maybe having disciples will make her more responsible ... well, okay, not like she really needs it. It's totally not my plan to have Hennah and Myranda bond through shared suffering from something where I'm not directly to blame. *innocent look*

Weird mostly and she's given to hysterics.

... she's not going to last very long before her first psychotic break then.

Mostly the first but if one could kill with pure hate you're entire party would have been disintegrated into your individual electrons, protons and neutrons.

You talk to him?

Not beyond whatever is considered a polite greeting in passing. Though if he decides to try and start something, I'll give him my best OURS IS THE FURY glare and growl in return. I don't intend to be the one to start the hostilities, but I sure as hell am going to end them.
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Post by Brian Boru Sun Oct 05, 2014 5:12 am

Psyckosama wrote:"Don't be a fool, man. At this rate I'll be owing your heir the hand of first born daughter..."

That get's a laugh out of me.

Still grim. These people have lost an uncomfortable about due to those fuckers. They were laughing to forget it.

Right shutting up now, and trying to think of a funny story.

You found 50 fucking dragons. do basic math

HAH!

He laughs.

And I laugh with him.

d10...

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Yep. And a tidy sum.

And so my rise to fame and fortune begins.

You get a nod and to be honest, the customary amount is waiting for you when you get back.

Seems the King's Guard take this deadly seriously.

Considering the quality of his arms, armor, and steed you're looking at another large amount (mind breaking out the RPG for me?)

21 Gold Dragons and 120 Silver Stags

Awesome. I am making fucking BANK here.

Cool.

Anyways, Draymon and Martyn clean house.

Draymon ends up going head to head with a poor sap of a hedge knight who frankly looked more like a parody of the knight than an actual knight. Shockingly though, the man actually performs rather well. His training is crap, his equipment is worse, and his mount looks like an old nag that's frankly looks like it can barely support his weight. But he actually has a lot of guts and takes a couple blows to take down. With a decent teacher, gear that wasn't ass, and a horse that wouldn't look out of place in a glue factory he might have done something with himself...

I might see into this guy if I get the chance to. I know a plot hook when I see one.

I do make sure to congratulate Draymon for his victory.

Martyn is put up against a knight in decent armor wearing the colors of House Wythers. Probably a sworn sword like himself. It's a pretty short contest. He's obviously the better skilled of the two.

Congrats master, once I get the chance.

As for young Clyton, he also ends up against a house knight. For him its a harder contest but while his gear isn't quite the match, and his horse not the best fit, he pretty much holds on for dear life. If he looses his arms and armor now, he might as well throw himself into the Rush.

He actually manages to pull a victory but he looks beat.

I give him encouragement and remind him that he's too damn big for any of these bastards to knock down. And I promise to help him if he has to ransom anything back he my comrade in arms now and we look out for each other.

Half brother? Don't see a resemblance.

As far as either of know at least. Laughing

This time you get a common knight. Noone as impressive as the king's guard. He's wearing the colors of House Florent. Probably one of your aunts many many cousins.

Huh wonder if he had to get that custom made for his big Florent ears.

Anyways, he puts up a damned good fight, but goes down pretty quickly.

The odds were pretty much in your favor at this point so it really wasn't worth betting.

No hard feelings and I get ready for the next round.

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Edd

"I think the Wall is one of those sights everyone should see before they die. It's amazing. Just don't accept anything in black..."

And more laughter along with a comment that you have a tongue of silver as well as arms of steel.

"You're a king. If you can't, on occasion, toss someone really sleazy and obnoxious off of the walls of the red keep, then what's the point? Just tell everyone he slipped..." Razz

HA, he might just do that if he has to listen to that simpering manner of his for too much longer.

So?

And he begins to mimic the advice in the book almost overnight. It's downright scary how quick he picks it up.

"It's a gift."

Indeed it is. The gods have gifted you they have.

Wild hemlock is a look alike of wild carrot. Little known fact.

And now I know. (cue shooting star logo)

"I also expect you not to use it on yours. It's a nasty poison. Not one of the ones you commonly play with. You know what I'm talking about."

She would. There are some toxins you don't fuck around with.

Oh she's had some experience with that, carelessness in handling some substance, pricking fingers with needles and the like, but she's become incredibly deft in handling fragile substances like that.

It's a clear liquid that is then bound to a powder. It has faint a small of almond...

"So, would you like to test it? I'm sure there's at least one murderer or rapist in the city who'd accept the mercy of poison over the headman's bloody axe..."

She actually seems to ponder this for a moment before sweetly nodding and saying she has a list she could write up. A BIG list of people she would love to test this on. You might want to monitor this.

"Oh, relax... they're good lads and they'll treat you right and properlly...." I raise an eyebrow. "Right?"

They quickly nod and by the end of the day they seem much more relaxed with each other that before.

They sure have enough in common Smile

I also introduce her to Samwell, who I'm sure will have a lot in common with the most bookish of the snakes. They're also about the same age. Smile

God, that would piss off his father.... Very Happy

Heh, stilted at first but once books are spoken about it does become more animated.

I salute him with full honor and respect. "Your reputation is well earned. If your blades had their customary toxins, I would be in a sorry condition indeed. Well fought, Ser! Well fought!"

"And to you my young friend. I have never fought one who was so fast and strong at your age."

I point out Ser Martyn. "I'm lucky enough to now have the man who trained me in my service, along with his current squire, Walder..." I nod to the GIANT that is Hodor.

He blinks in surprise when he takes in the relatively ordinary man, and blinks again at the massive size of Hodor.

What's next? Anything happen?

Well Doran does invite you to see the Water Gardens.

Any luck with prince Doran's gout?

Some slight relief, but it might be placebo, might need to wait a little longer.




Rieverre wrote:True, but maybe having disciples will make her more responsible ... well, okay, not like she really needs it. It's totally not my plan to have Hennah and Myranda bond through shared suffering from something where I'm not directly to blame. *innocent look*

HA, or it might mean they just now know how to hit each other harder and you getting in to break them up could get you a knee to the goolies by accident.

... she's not going to last very long before her first psychotic break then.

HAH!

Not beyond whatever is considered a polite greeting in passing. Though if he decides to try and start something, I'll give him my best OURS IS THE FURY glare and growl in return. I don't intend to be the one to start the hostilities, but I sure as hell am going to end them.

Nothing for a while, then when you're almost out of normal ear-shot you hear the words, "Cheater."

Do you respond?
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Post by Brian Boru Sun Oct 05, 2014 5:23 am

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Post by Brian Boru Sun Oct 05, 2014 5:25 am

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Post by Rieverre Sun Oct 05, 2014 5:56 am

Brian Boru wrote:HA, or it might mean they just now know how to hit each other harder and you getting in to break them up could get you a knee to the goolies by accident.

Possibly. I'll remain cautiously optimistic tho.

... and in the even that this does happen at some point, it would make me perfectly justified to deliver discipline via spankings.

Nothing for a while, then when you're almost out of normal ear-shot you hear the words, "Cheater."  

Do you respond?

I slow my horse and turn around, just to give my best look of deadpan 'what' back at the guy.

I'm pretty sure he's trying to goad me into something more dramatic, but while I'm not and have never been Marty McFly I can't really afford to let that go.

"Sparring yard taunts? Are we somehow still wet behind the ears squires and we've not noticed? If you've something to say to a man, say it to his _face_ instead of muttering it behind his back, Ser!"

Normally, I would have just ignored that shot and carried on, but in the world we're living in people can live or die by the reputation they've made for themselves. Besides, on the off chance that this _isn't_ a random slight, this could give me a heads-up on what's making the tavern rounds in the Crownlands in terms of rumors.
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Post by Psyckosama Sun Oct 05, 2014 6:17 am

Brian Boru wrote:That get's a laugh out of me.

He blinks. "That wasn't a Joke."

Right shutting up now, and trying to think of a funny story.

Nothing comes to mind...

And so my rise to fame and fortune begins.

Indeed!

21 Gold Dragons and 120 Silver Stags

Cha-Ching!

Awesome.  I am making fucking BANK here.

Yes, yes you are...

I might see into this guy if I get the chance to.  I know a plot hook when I see one.

Well, his name if Albyrt and he's a hedge knight from the Westerlands. His pa was a former redcloak and owned an inn. His parents died of the flux. His older brother got the inn, but it turned out his pa owned his old arms so he decided to find a horse and make a knight of himself. He even got knighted all right and proper...

I do make sure to congratulate Draymon for his victory.

"Thank you. Though I hope I come up against some more impressive foes. Brave but hopeless enemies are an easy win, but are no good in the books. I'd be lucky to get two coppers for his gear, and I'm not sure if I could even sell that nag as meat. I'm of half a mind to just return it all in pity. The other half is wondering if I shouldn't just keep it to save his life."

Congrats master, once I get the chance.

Tip of the helmet.

I give him encouragement and remind him that he's too damn big for any of these bastards to knock down.  And I promise to help him if he has to ransom anything back he my comrade in arms now and we look out for each other.

He grins. "With the ransom of his arms, I could chance the risk... but I'll tell you now Ser, I'm keeping the bloody horse!"

It is a far lot better than his own tired mount.

As far as either of know at least. Laughing

heh Wink

OOC infor remember?

Huh wonder if he had to get that custom made for his big Florent ears.

Well, its no dumbo helmet and you unhorse him nice and clean.

No hard feelings and I get ready for the next round.

The match after that is against another house knight, this time of House Frey. He does well enough, but quickly falls to your lance.

Then you get your next match.

Ser Gregor Clegane. The Mountain who Rides.

On the bright side, the odds are against you immensely.... so a good bet and you'll clean house. On the otherhand.. AAAAAGH!!!!!! Shocked

Anyways. It's a painful match.

Very painful.

On your first charge it's like running into the mountain he's named after.

On the second, not too different.

You go on for the better part of a dozen charges until he, seemingly grown sick of your match, aims a little low and to the side and strikes you below your lance. You hear the rending of metal and the breaking of bone as his lance shatters against your torso. You almost black out in pain, but against all agony you manage to keep from being thrown.

Then, as you swim in your head, lost in pain and feeling like you're going to vomit, the next pass comes and you feel a heat in your belly and a clarity that goes beyond all logic. In the next charge, it's like slow motion as you target your lance, heedless of the pain and time the movement and angle of your shield perfectly in a movement that deflects his lance.

In that final charge, you dismount the mountain who rides, so quickly, so cleanly that he actually has a moment of airtime.

Then you all but collapse in pain as the king cheers on like a lunatic. Joffery, shockingly enough is screaming with him, though he does have a bit of a mad look in his eyes. Even the queen is impressed by this.

All too soon though, comes your next match. You're against Ser Alyn Stackspear. He's a leering knight of some skill and bad reputation.

His first charge is clean, well done, and exceedingly dirty. He strikes you directly in the dent left by the mountain.

Your lance falters and you manage to trot on back to the finish line before slipping off of your mount, unable to hold on due to the agony.

He tips his helmet, smirks, raises his lance in victory and then...

"I DON'T BLOODY THINK SO!"

The King has stood up and is standing at the edge of the royal box, crimson with the fury his house takes its words from. "What the fuck was that?"

"I unhorsed him, my king..."

"You boy buggering son of a whore, you dare call yourself a fucking knight?! You've done no fucking thing. He made it back to the bloody fucking line before he bloody fucking fell and that means he's still in this fucking match!"

He looks at you. "Well man, get back on your gods damned horse and beat this honorless cunt!"

Anyways, assuming you do (and feel free to throw in what you do in detail)...

You beat him after three more exchanges. It's excruciating, but you do successfully unhorse him then all but fall from your mount once it's over.

As you line on the ground and gasp in pain, something lands on your chest, with a dull thud. It's painful as shit, and heavy, but when you look up you notice it's a pouch of coins. Looking up more, you see the King nodding to you.

Then you see Joffery sneer and say something you can't make out and then Robert turns on him red faced. You can just make out a rant in progress before your "Mystery Squire" drags you back into your tent, pulls off your helmet, and backhands you.

"You fucking idiot!" she exclaims. "Are you trying to get yourself killed?!"

Edd

And more laughter along with a comment that you have a tongue of silver as well as arms of steel.

"I could make so many unbecoming jokes right now, it's almost funny."

HA, he might just do that if he has to listen to that simpering manner of his for too much longer.

I laugh.

And he begins to mimic the advice in the book almost overnight.  It's downright scary how quick he picks it up.

Any luck?

Indeed it is.  The gods have gifted you they have.

Again, so many jokes...

And now I know. (cue shooting star logo)

And knowing is half the battle...

Oh she's had some experience with that, carelessness in handling some substance, pricking fingers with needles and the like, but she's become incredibly deft in handling fragile substances like that.

It's less its fragile and more you don't use it on anyone you don't want to kill. Full stop.

She actually seems to ponder this for a moment before sweetly nodding and saying she has a list she could write up.  A BIG list of people she would love to test this on.  You might want to monitor this.

I do. Oh, I do... reason I suggested prisoners.

They quickly nod and by the end of the day they seem much more relaxed with each other that before.

Cool. I want her to have friends. And ask her how she likes Sunspear.

I do talk to robert about the idea of fostering her here as a possiblity once she's been in kings landing for a time.... she'd learn to be a strong woman and they would not look down on her being a bastard.

Heh, stilted at first but once books are spoken about it does become more animated.

Here's to luck.

"And to you my young friend.  I have never fought one who was so fast and strong at your age."

"I hope to one day fight by your side. With you as my brother in arms, I think few enemies could match us."

He blinks in surprise when he takes in the relatively ordinary man, and blinks again at the massive size of Hodor.

"He's a wonderful teacher... and as for Walder, well, he might look the size of the mountain but he's a gentle giant who would not harm a fly that did not first earn his ire with cruelty and dishonor."

Well Doran does invite you to see the Water Gardens.

I of course join him

Some slight relief, but it might be placebo, might need to wait a little longer.

Here's to hope.

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Post by Brian Boru Sun Oct 05, 2014 6:51 am

Psyckosama wrote:He blinks. "That wasn't a Joke."

I immediately stop. I cough, blush, and mutter "Milord is too kind."

Nothing comes to mind...

Darn

Well, his name if Albyrt and he's a hedge knight from the Westerlands. His pa was a former redcloak and owned an inn. His parents died of the flux. His older brother got the inn, but it turned out his pa owned his old arms so he decided to find a horse and make a knight of himself. He even got knighted all right and proper...

I chuckle and think, well I got myself a hill.

"Thank you. Though I hope I come up against some more impressive foes. Brave but hopeless enemies are an easy win, but are no good in the books. I'd be lucky to get two coppers for his gear, and I'm not sure if I could even sell that nag as meat. I'm of half a mind to just return it all in pity. The other half is wondering if I shouldn't just keep it to save his life."

I offer to pay for it and I'll see if I can give the guy a few pointers, I have a feeling the kid might have some potential he just needs some help getting there.

He grins. "With the ransom of his arms, I could chance the risk... but I'll tell you now Ser, I'm keeping the bloody horse!"

It is a far lot better than his own tired mount.

"HA then make sure you take one of the REALLY nice ones then if you can."

Well, its no dumbo helmet and you unhorse him nice and clean.

HEH

The match after that is against another house knight, this time of House Frey. He does well enough, but quickly falls to your lance.

Heh

Then you get your next match.

Ser Gregor Clegane. The Mountain who Rides.

Fuck

On the bright side, the odds are against you immensely.... so a good bet and you'll clean house. On the otherhand.. AAAAAGH!!!!!!  Shocked

Fuck....all in.... if I win then I'll need to pay for my medical bills, if I lose well I'll be too dead to care.

Anyways. It's a painful match.

Fuck

Very painful.

Double fuck.

On your first charge it's like running into the mountain he's named after.

Triple fuck

On the second, not too different.

Quadruple fuck.

You go on for the better part of a dozen charges until he, seemingly grown sick of your match, aims a little low and to the side and strikes you below your lance. You hear the rending of metal and the breaking of bone as his lance shatters against your torso. You almost black out in pain, but against all agony you manage to keep from being thrown.

FUUUUUUCCCCKKKK

Then, as you swim in your head, lost in pain and feeling like you're going to vomit, the next pass comes and you feel a heat in your belly and a clarity that goes beyond all logic. In the next charge, it's like slow motion as you target your lance, heedless of the pain and time the movement and angle of your shield perfectly in a movement that deflects his lance.

FUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKK YYYYYYYOOOOOOUUUUUU!

In that final charge, you dismount the mountain who rides, so quickly, so cleanly that he actually has a moment of airtime.

Fuck Yeah!

Then you all but collapse in pain as the king cheers on like a lunatic. Joffery, shockingly enough is screaming with him, though he does have a bit of a mad look in his eyes. Even the queen is impressed by this.

All too soon though, comes your next match. You're against Ser Alyn Stackspear. He's a leering knight of some skill and bad reputation.

His first charge is clean, well done, and exceedingly dirty. He strikes you directly in the dent left by the mountain.

Your lance falters and you manage to trot on back to the finish line before slipping off of your mount, unable to hold on due to the agony.

He tips his helmet, smirks, raises his lance in victory and then...

"I DON'T BLOODY THINK SO!"

The King has stood up and is standing at the edge of the royal box, crimson with the fury his house takes its words from. "What the fuck was that?"

"I unhorsed him, my king..."

"You boy buggering son of a whore, you dare call yourself a fucking knight?! You've done no fucking thing. He made it back to the bloody fucking line before he bloody fucking fell and that means he's still in this fucking match!"

He looks at you. "Well man, get back on your gods damned horse and beat this honorless cunt!"

Anyways, assuming you do (and feel free to throw in what you do in detail)...

Solid hardnose jousting.

Brian Boru carried out 1 launched of one d10 :
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You beat him after three more exchanges. It's excruciating, but you do successfully unhorse him then all but fall from your mount once it's over.

As you line on the ground and gasp in pain, something lands on your chest, with a dull thud. It's painful as shit, and heavy, but when you look up you notice it's a pouch of coins. Looking up more, you see the King nodding to you.

Heh heh ow awesome.

Then you see Joffery sneer and say something you can't make out and then Robert turns on him red faced. You can just make out a rant in progress before your "Mystery Squire" drags you back into your tent, pulls off your helmet, and backhands you.

"You fucking idiot!" she exclaims. "Are you trying to get yourself killed?!"

"No. I am trying to make sure we have something better than being guests and servants. I'm trying to show our old man that we're worthy to be acknowledged. We've gone through too damn much just getting here to stop now. I don't plan on backing down until they finally beat me fair and square. I'm sorry I scared you so badly sister, but I have to do this. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't."



Edd

"I could make so many unbecoming jokes right now, it's almost funny."

And that sets the hard-bitten woman off giggling of all things.

Any luck?

Considering his normal strategy, through a girl on the bed then dive on...this is a distinct improvement.

And knowing is half the battle...

G...I...JOE!

It's less its fragile and more you don't use it on anyone you don't want to kill. Full stop.

Call it a euphemism but yes she understands.

I do. Oh, I do... reason I suggested prisoners.

Roll a d100.

Cool. I want her to have friends. And ask her how she likes Sunspear.

She likes it quite a bit.

I do talk to robert about the idea of fostering her here as a possiblity once she's been in kings landing for a time.... she'd learn to be a strong woman and they would not look down on her being a bastard.

He only has to think on it for a few minutes before he agrees. The Dornish first family seem wiling to take her in among them.

Here's to luck.

Heh

"I hope to one day fight by your side. With you as my brother in arms, I think few enemies could match us."

"Hah any foe that meets us will be dead before they hit the ground.

"He's a wonderful teacher... and as for Walder, well, he might look the size of the mountain but he's a gentle giant who would not harm a fly that did not first earn his ire with cruelty and dishonor."

He looks longer, then shaking his head, he turns to you and says he'll take your work for it.

I of course join him

Exellant. Roll a dq100.

Here's to hope.

Indeed.
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Post by Psyckosama Sun Oct 05, 2014 7:59 pm

Brian Boru wrote:I immediately stop.  I cough, blush, and mutter "Milord is too kind."

Deep sigh.


I chuckle and think, well I got myself a hill.

He ain't no Hill, ser! His parents were all right and wed 'fore a Septum.

I offer to pay for it and I'll see if I can give the guy a few pointers, I have a feeling the kid might have some potential he just needs some help getting there.

He just gives it to you.

"HA then make sure you take one of the REALLY nice ones then if you can."

Aye!

Anyways, your two comrades are not so lucky.

Ser Martyn has the piss poor luck of being put up against Barristan the Bold. The look on his face is memorable to be sure. Pretty much "Oh bugger me up the cornhole with a morningstar."

He actually survives 5 passes before being thrown from his mount. Barristan salutes his valor and you discover later that Ser Barristan does not keep the arms and armor of opponents he considers honorable unless he knows for a fact that they can pay the ransom costs.

Ser Draymon has slightly better luck. Slightly as in only a hair better. In his second match he draws a house knight whom he defeats cleanrly, but in his third he draws Jamie Fucking Lannister.

Needless to say, Jamie seems to take relish in humiliating him on the field. That said, that arrogant peacock seems to make an ass out of himself in every match. He doesn't openly humiliate his foes, but he seems to toy with them.

Fuck

Yep.

Fuck....all in.... if I win then I'll need to pay for my medical bills, if I lose well I'll be too dead to care.

10-1 against. Do the math. :p

Anyways. It's a painful match.

Fuck

Double fuck.

Triple fuck

Quadruple fuck.

FUUUUUUCCCCKKKK

FUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKK  YYYYYYYOOOOOOUUUUUU!

Quite.

Fuck Yeah!

Considering your abilities, shouldn't that be "America, Fuck Yeah!"?

Solid hardnose jousting.

*whistles at roll*

Let me change that. After a single exchange you basically send him flying through the air like a self-propelled douche-rocket... seriously, the guy does a goddamned barrel role.

You still fall off the goddamned horse once you make it back to the line but this cunt actually gets airtime and is knocked completely stupid.

You went into the same berzerker like state you did against the mountain and it shows.


Heh heh ow awesome.

Roll me a d100

"No.  I am trying to make sure we have something better than being guests and servants.  I'm trying to show our old man that we're worthy to be acknowledged. We've gone through too damn much just getting here to stop now.  I don't plan on backing down until they finally beat me fair and square.  I'm sorry I scared you so badly sister, but I have to do this.  I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't."

"You can't do that if you're dead, now take your bloody top off so I can bind those ribs."

She he's you remove your armor and then orders your chestplate sent to a smith to have the dent pounded out.

Once your armor's off its clear your chest is basically a single black and blue mass and the pain is overwealming.

After you're bound you find yourself getting several messages. A number of lord wish to speak to you once the torney is complete.

Edd

And that sets the hard-bitten woman off giggling of all things.

I smile. "You should laugh more often.I find laughter is a good medicine. While it does not cure what ails us, it makes the things that do seem petty for just a moment and frees your soul from worry."

I look wistful for a moment. "I'm happy to see my father is laughing again. That Lannister wench really stole the joy from his heart."

Considering his normal strategy, through a girl on the bed then dive on...this is a distinct improvement.

Hey, he knows how to the charming.

G...I...JOE!

Smile

Call it a euphemism but yes she understands.

"I know, just... this stuff is new to you so I just want to be sure you do not underestimate it. Last thing I want to do is explain to your father how his darling girl injured herself playing with my new gift."

Roll a d100.

Either way, I do clarify that all members of the royal party are off limits.

Psyckosama carried out 1 launched of one d100 :
39

She likes it quite a bit.

I'm happy and I give her a loving big brother hug.

He only has to think on it for a few minutes before he agrees.  The Dornish first family seem wiling to take her in among them.

Good. I'm glad. Lets not rush it, but when the time comes I think she'll be happy here. Good place to come into herself as a woman. and probably the best family to foster her with in the whole of Westeros. Secures their loyalty via a show of trust, and the strong Dornish view on women will ensure that she grows up strong.

Depending on the read we get from him, and if Cat can get her head out of her cunt, we could consider fostering Edric Storm with Ned in a couple years.

"Hah any foe that meets us will be dead before they hit the ground.

"Indeed. Add my father to the team and I doubt they'd even last that long. We're a right deadly bunch here. So what do you hunt in these parts? I'd love to hunt with you, and I'm sure that if we say the word within a hundred yards of my father he'll be here and ready with a boar spear in hand and a giant smile on his face."

He looks longer, then shaking his head, he turns to you and says he'll take your work for it.

"It's true. I like to consider myself a good test of character..." I think for a moment and smile, "Take Tyrion for example. Most people look at him and see a half man. I see him as the one member of that blasted family worth half a damn. Tywin's a monster, Jamie was an idiotic peacock, Cersei had all of her fathers spite with not a lick of his competence, and Tyrion? Physically.... physically most would say he's as deformed as his father's twisted soul. But his mind is clear and his wit is sharp, and his character... while at times abrasive... is far more honorable than most. I choose my companions carefully."

I lean back, "It's one of the reasons I like you. While sometimes your passions can get the best of you, I can easily admit to having the same sin. You are a good man and I respect you. It's also why I've formed friendships with your daughters, for they're inherited your best qualities. You've raised wonderful girls and I'll tell you now that when I become king, they will find a personal friend sits on that throne."

Exellant.  Roll a dq100.

Psyckosama carried out 1 launched of one d100 :
49

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Post by Brian Boru Mon Oct 06, 2014 3:16 pm

Rieverre wrote:Possibly. I'll remain cautiously optimistic tho.

HA!

... and in the even that this does happen at some point, it would make me perfectly justified to deliver discipline via spankings.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

I slow my horse and turn around, just to give my best look of deadpan 'what' back at the guy.

I'm pretty sure he's trying to goad me into something more dramatic, but while I'm not and have never been Marty McFly I can't really afford to let that go.

"Sparring yard taunts? Are we somehow still wet behind the ears squires and we've not noticed? If you've something to say to a man, say it to his _face_ instead of muttering it behind his back, Ser!"

Normally, I would have just ignored that shot and carried on, but in the world we're living in people can live or die by the reputation they've made for themselves. Besides, on the off chance that this _isn't_ a random slight, this could give me a heads-up on what's making the tavern rounds in the Crownlands in terms of rumors.

Rage still on his face he turns his horse and rides back to you, JUST out of striking distance. "You heard me Bastard (you can FEEL the capital B there, as if it were defining your species and nature.) I deny you won that tournament by fair means. And even if you had a bastard does not deserve such honors, he befouls all tournaments just by competing."

You can tell he believes what he said down to his very core.


Psyckosama wrote:Deep sigh.

Still a bastard here.

He ain't no Hill, ser! His parents were all right and wed 'fore a Septum.

I DIDN'T actually SAY that man!

He just gives it to you.

And I give it back to the kid.

Aye!

Anyways, your two comrades are not so lucky.

Ser Martyn has the piss poor luck of being put up against Barristan the Bold. The look on his face is memorable to be sure. Pretty much "Oh bugger me up the cornhole with a morningstar."

He actually survives 5 passes before being thrown from his mount. Barristan salutes his valor and you discover later that Ser Barristan does not keep the arms and armor of opponents he considers honorable unless he knows for a fact that they can pay the ransom costs.

My condolences master. You still did better than most could hope.

Ser Draymon has slightly better luck. Slightly as in only a hair better. In his second match he draws a house knight whom he defeats cleanrly, but in his third he draws Jamie Fucking Lannister.

Needless to say, Jamie seems to take relish in humiliating him on the field. That said, that arrogant peacock seems to make an ass out of himself in every match. He doesn't openly humiliate his foes, but he seems to toy with them.

Also my condolences, I'll make sure to kick his tailbone up between his shoulders if I get the chance.

10-1 against. Do the math. :p

...12,000 gold dragons....I'M RICH I'M WEALTHY I GOT THE FUCKING BANK WAHOOO! YEAH BABY YEEEEEEEEHHHHHHAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!....ow..

Quite.

...I hurt....

Considering your abilities, shouldn't that be "America, Fuck Yeah!"?

HA!

*whistles at roll*

Let me change that. After a single exchange you basically send him flying through the air like a self-propelled douche-rocket... seriously, the guy does a goddamned barrel role.

You still fall off the goddamned horse once you make it back to the line but this cunt actually gets airtime and is knocked completely stupid.

You went into the same berzerker like state you did against the mountain and it shows.

I bow to him with all the respect and decorum I can muster. No sense in stooping to his level and makes me look good.

Roll me a d100

Brian Boru carried out 1 launched of one d100 :
5

"You can't do that if you're dead, now take your bloody top off so I can bind those ribs."

She he's you remove your armor and then orders your chestplate sent to a smith to have the dent pounded out.

Once your armor's off its clear your chest is basically a single black and blue mass and the pain is overwealming.

After you're bound you find yourself getting several messages. A number of lord wish to speak to you once the torney is complete.

I respond that I'll see them as soon as I can. Might well as have a few backups.

Right then I try to keep still and not agitate anything and pray to God/The Seven/The Old Gods/ROB that my ribs heal enough that I can compete tomorrow.



Edd
I smile. "You should laugh more often.I find laughter is a good medicine. While it does not cure what ails us, it makes the things that do seem petty for just a moment and frees your soul from worry."[/quote]

She can't argue with that.

I look wistful for a moment. "I'm happy to see my father is laughing again. That Lannister wench really stole the joy from his heart."

When you mention Lannister a rictus of RAGE twitches across her face for a moment. It fades just as quickly but she mentions that however much you humiliated them it still wasn't enough for revenge in her mind. To satisfy her, her siblings or her father it would take murdering every single solitary Lannister or someone related to the Lannisters even with only half a drop of Lannister blood in them. (Even a generously low guestimation of such a venture would mean taking out half of the Westerlands and an uncomfortably large amount of the other kingdoms)

If you mention that she'll go "So?"

Hey, he knows how to the charming.

Has he had to really try for the past decade or so?

"I know, just... this stuff is new to you so I just want to be sure you do not underestimate it. Last thing I want to do is explain to your father how his darling girl injured herself playing with my new gift."

After an uncomfortably cute huff, considering the topic, she promises to be careful.

Either way, I do clarify that all members of the royal party are off limits.

39

Well you later learn a blonde haired and green eyed sailor died horribly while eating at a tavern the night before.

I'm happy and I give her a loving big brother hug.

Dah...

Good. I'm glad. Lets not rush it, but when the time comes I think she'll be happy here. Good place to come into herself as a woman. and probably the best family to foster her with in the whole of Westeros. Secures their loyalty via a show of trust, and the strong Dornish view on women will ensure that she grows up strong.

Depending on the read we get from him, and if Cat can get her head out of her cunt, we could consider fostering Edric Storm with Ned in a couple years.

Heh

"Indeed. Add my father to the team and I doubt they'd even last that long. We're a right deadly bunch here. So what do you hunt in these parts? I'd love to hunt with you, and I'm sure that if we say the word within a hundred yards of my father he'll be here and ready with a boar spear in hand and a giant smile on his face."

Well there are some desert antelope. Nothing like the massive reptiles of the Western part of the desert.

"It's true. I like to consider myself a good test of character..." I think for a moment and smile, "Take Tyrion for example. Most people look at him and see a half man. I see him as the one member of that blasted family worth half a damn. Tywin's a monster, Jamie was an idiotic peacock, Cersei had all of her fathers spite with not a lick of his competence, and Tyrion? Physically.... physically most would say he's as deformed as his father's twisted soul. But his mind is clear and his wit is sharp, and his character... while at times abrasive... is far more honorable than most. I choose my companions carefully."

I lean back, "It's one of the reasons I like you. While sometimes your passions can get the best of you, I can easily admit to having the same sin. You are a good man and I respect you. It's also why I've formed friendships with your daughters, for they're inherited your best qualities. You've raised wonderful girls and I'll tell you now that when I become king, they will find a personal friend sits on that throne."

He's surprisingly touched by your complements. Most just say he can't keep in his pants to save his life or that he's a skinny Robert.

49

Though the trip is a short one, you come across a freak thunderstorm rolling in from the coast. Soaking the entire party before you manage to get under cover. Making it a bit tough to enjoy the place for a while.
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Post by Rieverre Mon Oct 06, 2014 4:10 pm

Brian Boru wrote:Ha ha ha ha ha!

We all have our hopes and dreams.

Rage still on his face he turns his horse and rides back to you, JUST out of striking distance.  "You heard me Bastard (you can FEEL the capital B there, as if it were defining your species and nature.)  I deny you won that tournament by fair means.  And even if you had a bastard does not deserve such honors, he befouls all tournaments just by competing."

You can tell he believes what he said down to his very core.

"That's a bit sad. One ... how exactly would I have cheated in the _Royal_ tournament? I mean, bribery is clearly out, given I spanked a Lannister and the _Mountain_ and the queen was calling for my head long before the end of it. And if it wasn't bribery and if there exist such highly effective ways of laying low knights without slaying them in the course of armed contest, why aren't all the armies of the Seven Kingdoms using them?"

"Two ... so, what you're saying is, someone beat down the cream of the crop of Westerosi knighthood in martial combat, in a tournament no less, and upon finding this man traveling with his entourage and not bound by tournament rules any longer, your first instinct is to level what might be considered mortal insult against this person? A person you consider to be of low moral quality, and know for a fact to be _very good at killing people_?"

I give him the kind of look that is reserved for particularly slow children or the mentally infirm.

Then, after a heartbeat, I add in a lower tone of voice, just enough for him to hear and looking through him rather than at him, as if he were little more than an inconvenience to drag off of the blade of my sword or trample under my horse's hooves. "I'd advise you to be careful in accusing people, Ser. You see, _sometimes they might oblige you_."
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Post by Psyckosama Tue Oct 07, 2014 10:25 pm

Brian Boru wrote:Still a bastard here.

I know.

I DIDN'T actually SAY that man!

It was a joke.

And I give it back to the kid.

"Thank you, Ser..."

My condolences master.  You still did better than most could hope.

"I lasted five rounds with the head of the King's Guard and I didn't have to buy back my equipment.... all in all, I'm coming out a nice purse full of Dragon's richer. Not the blasted hoard you've managed to find for yourself, but I'm not going to be at want for wine no wench for quite some time which suits me well enough..."

He pauses to himself then grins like an idiot, "Oi, boy, isn't it tradition for a squire to grand his master part of his winnings in thanks?"

Obviously toying with you here.

Also my condolences, I'll make sure to kick his tailbone up between his shoulders if I get the chance.

His response is not fit for delicate ears.

...12,000 gold dragons....I'M RICH I'M WEALTHY I GOT THE FUCKING BANK WAHOOO!  YEAH BABY YEEEEEEEEHHHHHHAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!....ow..

And now you just have to make sure you can collect it. A lot of people just lost a lot of money on a "Sure thing"

Though did you add the ransom of arms and equipment to that list?

...I hurt....

Very much.

5

You get a number of messages from lords across Westeros who want to speak with you. Due to your mystery knight status you are not visited during the Torny as to do so would endanger your secrecy. There's a whole Drama about it. Mystery Knight are to be left to their secrecy. Even if they're invited to sup with kings and lords, they're given use of face covering helms that allow them to eat and drink without exposing their identities.

You can visit them, they can't visit you. Though you do get a lot of people asking if you're competing tomorrow.

Though you do have some special visitor. The king has sent a Maester to tend your wound. He'd very much like to see you compete if you are able to do so without endangering yourself.

I respond that I'll see them as soon as I can.  Might well as have a few backups.

Mya sighs and starts writing replies. This'll take all bloody night...

[quote]Right then I try to keep still and not agitate anything and pray to God/The Seven/The Old Gods/ROB that my ribs heal enough that I can compete tomorrow.

The next morning they're tender but you swear they've have weeks to heal.

Your first foe is Ser Janos Slynt, Captain of the Gold Cloaks. He did okay, just managing to get through the first day with some luck and the fact that to get that job you can't be totally useless...

Now though, he's looking like he's about ready to shit himself, though he just manages to steel himself and mount his steed.

Edd
She can't argue with that.

[quote]When you mention Lannister a rictus of RAGE twitches across her face for a moment.  It fades just as quickly but she mentions that however much you humiliated them it still wasn't enough for revenge in her mind.  To satisfy her, her siblings or her father it would take murdering every single solitary Lannister or someone related to the Lannisters even with only half a drop of Lannister blood in them.  (Even a generously low guestimation of such a venture would mean taking out half of the Westerlands and an uncomfortably large amount of the other kingdoms)

If you mention that she'll go "So?"[quote]

"Anger is a weapon. Fury can give you the power to go onward when little else will, but if you let it rule you, it will rule you," I said calmly, "Tywin fucking Lannister's crimes are his alone, just as Rhaenys and Aegon were innocent of Aerys and Rheagar's madness. He is the one to focus your rage on, for he deserves every iota of hatred you can pull from your heart."

Has he had to really try for the past decade or so?

To Robert, I believe it's second nature. Really, its his true nature. This king shit makes him uncomfortable because he does his best work not on a goddamned throne lording over people. He sucks at that. He's best doing running about as he is now, talking to people and making friends... and lets be honest, back into fighting form, months freed of Cersei's influence? I don't think here's a pair of knickers safe in Westeros if he got his mind to it.

After an uncomfortably cute huff, considering the topic, she promises to be careful.

"You're adorable when you scrunch your nose like that. It's a bit disconcerting considering the topic at hand, but still adorable."

Well you later learn a blonde haired and green eyed sailor died horribly while eating at a tavern the night before.

I'm rather annoyed by this and tell her as much. Unless the man was secretly a rapist or murderer I'm actually rather upset to be honest.

Well there are some desert antelope.  Nothing like the massive reptiles of the Western part of the desert.

I send word to Robert... quick hunting adventure?

In the meantime I tell him in passing and completely off the record, that Tywin Lannister is a maggot who'd best serve the realm as fertilizer. Talk to Tyrion. There's much you two would agree on... well, beyond the obvious shared interest in wine and whores.

Again, this conversation never happened.

He's surprisingly touched by your complements.  Most just say he can't keep in his pants to save his life or that he's a skinny Robert.

"I know you have many contacts and surprising depths few know to explore. I value his combat abilities, but his less advertised talents are what interest me the most. I know that given proper cause he is able to be covert and ruthless in a manner that would leave those same people utterly befuddled..."

And on a more personal note, his daughters adore him and are all wonderful girls. When I take the throne one of my early acts will be either to grant them a noble house... I'm thinking that 'House Viper" sounds pleasant enough. I can see their arms now. A red viper coiled around a biasing sun."

Or maybe even... depending on how things turn out, and pending his go ahead, along his bother and niece's permission... proper legitimization.

Though the trip is a short one, you come across a freak thunderstorm rolling in from the coast.  Soaking the entire party before you manage to get under cover.  Making it a bit tough to enjoy the place for a while.

I'm good natured about it crack some jokes. Why, I'll even tell a story to help lighten the mood...

How about the Princess Bride?

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Post by Brian Boru Wed Oct 08, 2014 3:35 am

Rieverre wrote:We all have our hopes and dreams.

HA!

"That's a bit sad. One ... how exactly would I have cheated in the _Royal_ tournament? I mean, bribery is clearly out, given I spanked a Lannister and the _Mountain_ and the queen was calling for my head long before the end of it. And if it wasn't bribery and if there exist such highly effective ways of laying low knights without slaying them in the course of armed contest, why aren't all the armies of the Seven Kingdoms using them?"

He stays silent.

"Two ... so, what you're saying is, someone beat down the cream of the crop of Westerosi knighthood in martial combat, in a tournament no less, and upon finding this man traveling with his entourage and not bound by tournament rules any longer, your first instinct is to level what might be considered mortal insult against this person? A person you consider to be of low moral quality, and know for a fact to be _very good at killing people_?"

I give him the kind of look that is reserved for particularly slow children or the mentally infirm.

Then, after a heartbeat, I add in a lower tone of voice, just enough for him to hear and looking through him rather than at him, as if he were little more than an inconvenience to drag off of the blade of my sword or trample under my horse's hooves. "I'd advise you to be careful in accusing people, Ser. You see, _sometimes they might oblige you_."

Well he snaps and draws his sword. His companions, all 6 of them, do so as well. Looks like you have a fight.

Roll a d100.



Psyckosama wrote:"Thank you, Ser..."

"Only a jackass does that to a man who couldn't pay."

"I lasted five rounds with the head of the King's Guard and I didn't have to buy back my equipment.... all in all, I'm coming out a nice purse full of Dragon's richer. Not the blasted hoard you've managed to find for yourself, but I'm not going to be at want for wine no wench for quite some time which suits me well enough..."

He pauses to himself then grins like an idiot, "Oi, boy, isn't it tradition for a squire to grand his master part of his winnings in thanks?"

Obviously toying with you here.

I chuckle and say, "If you think you can knock me off my horse I'll give you half."

His response is not fit for delicate ears.

I let him vent though if any children are around I'll tell them to leave no point in corrupting the youth.

And now you just have to make sure you can collect it. A lot of people just lost a lot of money on a "Sure thing"

Though did you add the ransom of arms and equipment to that list?

I think I'd rather avoid demanding a ransom from Clegane, no point in pissing off that maniac when I'm not in mint condition.

Also I see if I can get a list of the people in that bet, if they renege on their debt then I plan to pay them a visit. It might be Lannister-ish of me but when it comes to money I hold short shrift with people who owe me.

You get a number of messages from lords across Westeros who want to speak with you. Due to your mystery knight status you are not visited during the Torny as to do so would endanger your secrecy. There's a whole Drama about it. Mystery Knight are to be left to their secrecy. Even if they're invited to sup with kings and lords, they're given use of face covering helms that allow them to eat and drink without exposing their identities.

Any particularly rich ones heh heh...

You can visit them, they can't visit you. Though you do get a lot of people asking if you're competing tomorrow.

Unless they beat me in a fair fight or I'm dead, I am getting on that damn horse and holding a damn lance. In so many words.

Though you do have some special visitor. The king has sent a Maester to tend your wound. He'd very much like to see you compete if you are able to do so without endangering yourself.

I ask that the Maester relay my thanks for his Grace's great kindness in his gesture. And that unless I'm dead I'm going to be on a horse tomorrow.

Mya sighs and starts writing replies. This'll take all bloody night...

I'll help.

The next morning they're tender but you swear they've have weeks to heal.

Excellent.

Your first foe is Ser Janos Slynt, Captain of the Gold Cloaks. He did okay, just managing to get through the first day with some luck and the fact that to get that job you can't be totally useless...

Heh heh heh, this ought to be good.

Now though, he's looking like he's about ready to shit himself, though he just manages to steel himself and mount his steed.

I've got one of these going on under my helmet.


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Edd


"Anger is a weapon. Fury can give you the power to go onward when little else will, but if you let it rule you, it will rule you," I said calmly, "Tywin fucking Lannister's crimes are his alone, just as Rhaenys and Aegon were innocent of Aerys and Rheagar's madness. He is the one to focus your rage on, for he deserves every iota of hatred you can pull from your heart."

"But you can only kill him once."

To Robert, I believe it's second nature. Really, its his true nature. This king shit makes him uncomfortable because he does his best work not on a goddamned throne lording over people. He sucks at that. He's best doing running about as he is now, talking to people and making friends... and lets be honest, back into fighting form, months freed of Cersei's influence? I don't think here's a pair of knickers safe in Westeros if he got his mind to it.

True when he's on his A-Game the man has Charisma coming out of ears, but he IS rusty at the moment though.

OOC: Still made me laugh.

"You're adorable when you scrunch your nose like that. It's a bit disconcerting considering the topic at hand, but still adorable."

You think she blushed there, though what she's blushing about you'd rather not know.

I'm rather annoyed by this and tell her as much. Unless the man was secretly a rapist or murderer I'm actually rather upset to be honest.

He smiled like a Lannister, she snapped. Though he DID cheat at dice with utter regularity, so there IS that.

I send word to Robert... quick hunting adventure?

He's game for it.

In the meantime I tell him in passing and completely off the record, that Tywin Lannister is a maggot who'd best serve the realm as fertilizer. Talk to Tyrion. There's much you two would agree on... well, beyond the obvious shared interest in wine and whores.

Again, this conversation never happened.

He chuckles but he does talk with Tyrion later on, seems to have been an animated discussion whatever it was. (you know damn well what the subjects were)

"I know you have many contacts and surprising depths few know to explore. I value his combat abilities, but his less advertised talents are what interest me the most. I know that given proper cause he is able to be covert and ruthless in a manner that would leave those same people utterly befuddled..."

And on a more personal note, his daughters adore him and are all wonderful girls. When I take the throne one of my early acts will be either to grant them a noble house... I'm thinking that 'House Viper" sounds pleasant enough. I can see their arms now. A red viper coiled around a biasing sun."

Or maybe even... depending on how things turn out, and pending his go ahead, along his bother and niece's permission... proper legitimization.

Well it would certainly go towards making things more...cordial with Dorne.

I'm good natured about it crack some jokes. Why, I'll even tell a story to help lighten the mood...

How about the Princess Bride?

Well you certainly get them laughing their heads off at that one. Apparently parody and satire is rare in Westeros. Though Doran mentions he's seen plays based around that in the Free cities, as has Oberyn.
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Post by Rieverre Wed Oct 08, 2014 3:53 am

Brian Boru wrote:Well he snaps and draws his sword.  His companions, all 6 of them, do so as well.  Looks like you have a fight.

Roll a d100.

I don't even bother playing fair and I've been ready for this to go sideways from the start. He's close enough to bum-rush, so I give him a full helping of MINE IS THE FURY.

I'll hit the horse on the head in passing and try to clothesline him off, then I'll draw my sword go ahead and move on the others. I'll move from one to the next without slowing too much, striking in passing and using basically every dirty trick I can think of, from feinting at them to cut at their horses, the other way around, and making myself obviously the largest threat so my own knights can take advantage of their ... preoccupation.
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Post by Psyckosama Wed Oct 08, 2014 4:18 am

Brian Boru wrote:"Only a jackass does that to a man who couldn't pay."

"Woulda been the end of me, Ser. I owe you."

I chuckle and say, "If you think you can knock me off my horse I'll give you half."

He gives you a look. "Not going to ask for your hard earned coin, but I know more about how you fight than you do." he gives you a light thwap on the head, "You're not unstoppable lad, you just mummer it well enough for everyone who is not me."

I let him vent though if any children are around I'll tell them to leave no point in corrupting the youth.

You see one noble lady faint though...

I think I'd rather avoid demanding a ransom from Clegane, no point in pissing off that maniac when I'm not in mint condition.

Why not? :p

You're not giving him his shit back, are you? Or are you going to keep it. Sending a full suit of his armor down south might get a laugh.

Also I see if I can get a list of the people in that bet, if they renege on their debt then I plan to pay them a visit.  It might be Lannister-ish of me but when it comes to money I hold short shrift with people who owe me.

Well, you're probably going to have to shake down a lot of bookies.

Any particularly rich ones  heh heh...

Kevin Lannister it seems was here to represent his brother.

Unless they beat me in a fair fight or I'm dead, I am getting on that damn horse and holding a damn lance. In so many words.

Alright. d10?

I ask that the Maester relay my thanks for his Grace's great kindness in his gesture.  And that unless I'm dead I'm going to be on a horse tomorrow.

The Maester looks at your ribs and points out you might be dead if you get on that horse.

Plus his grace has sent for your breastplate to be sent to one of the Red Keeps own castle smiths for a quick repair.

You impressed the shit out of him.

I'll help.

"Lie the fuck down, brother..."

Excellent.

Yep. Your arm is better too.

Heh heh heh, this ought to be good.

For you.

I've got one of these going on under my helmet.

Not at all creepy.

5

Anyways. It's a clean match. He didn't have a chance in hell, but the man actually can fight like a devil if forced. He goes down of course, but he goes down kicking.

As you pass the royal box after the match, you do pick up Robert muttering that he managed to not humiliate himself, which considering his a gold cloak, is good for the king. Be a bit awkward for the captain of the iron gate to seem like a complete and utter puss.

9

Next up, the King Slayer himself! Jamie Lannister!

The arrogant peacock comes up and seems to soak it up before the crowd. He goes to the royal box, asks for his beloved sisters favor and proclaims with much drama how he's going to unmask you and gift her your helmet and have your steed snipped and set to a plow.

1

Well, after the last line you can almost FEEL the murderous intent coming from Motherfucker. For the first time since you sat on his back, you're not fighting your steed as much as your enemy. This horse is creepy intelligent and right now, he wants to kick Jamie Lannister's ass.

At the same time you feel that creepy sense of calm come over you.

Everything is clear, and makes sense... the horse charges clear, true and with all his might, foaming with fury, you're focused and its ready to murder someone who isn't YOU for once.

Jamie attacks with all his normal pride and confidence.

It's something of a miss match. When lances strike, there is no question. You grunt off his blow and barely slow down. Jamie on the other is sent flying ass over kettle. With one blow you sent the kingslayer flying. To put it into perspective you just hit a man half his size, with probably twice the power you did the Kingslayer.

His shield is a ruin. He actually flies 15 feet through the air and does a full loop before sliding to a rest on his front leaving a rut.

The second you make it back to the line, Motherfucker actually starts to fight you to stay on, and assuming you get off, the enraged horse walks up to the groaning man, and just as he turns over takes a long piss on his helmet before giving him a swift kick to the ribs and walking back to you, looking amazingly smug.

Meanwhile there's complete and utter silence. The queen is sitting there ghost white in complete mute horror. The King is just agape. The crowd is silent.

Then Robert starts laughing his ass off. He's red faced and crying. Then the crowd breaks out in cheers so loud its deafning.

Two more rolls. The next round is actually the championship round. After that is the squires, who are a smaller bunch and its timmed that way so the knights have time to rest for the melee, and the winning squire will be knighted in time for the melee if the king feels they've earned it

Edd

"But you can only kill him once."

"Vengeance is a fine wine, you can only drink it once. So savor it for it is fleeting."

True when he's on his A-Game the man has Charisma coming out of ears, but he IS rusty at the moment though.

He's had months to sharpen up.

So?
You think she blushed there, though what she's blushing about you'd rather not know.

Heh.

He smiled like a Lannister, she snapped.  Though he DID cheat at dice with utter regularity, so there IS that.

"And I travel with a Lannister. If Tywin was here, then I'd understand. I'd hope you'd be more discrete, but frankly there's nothing that could happen to him that he doesn't deserve. That man you murdered was as innocent. Never poison someone without good cause again. There's no shortage of motherfucker in these seven kingdoms, so if you're going to test your poisons, do it as an agent of justice. Not because you don't like the cut of a man's gib!"

He's game for it.

I see what you did there.

LETS GO!

He chuckles but he does talk with Tyrion later on, seems to have been an animated discussion whatever it was. (you know damn well what the subjects were)

I look smug in my complete ignorance.

Well it would certainly go towards making things more...cordial with Dorne.

It's the right thing to do. Smile

Well you certainly get them laughing their heads off at that one.  Apparently parody and satire is rare in Westeros. Though Doran mentions he's seen plays based around that in the Free cities, as has Oberyn.

I do change some names to protect the innocent. For example, Vizzini is from Volantis. Though Wess stays the Dread Pirate Roberts... honor the king and all. Wink

As for parody and satire, I believe any man who can't take a joke is only half a man. Problem is so many lords can't.

Might be a good idea to look into some precedent. I'm sure that once upon a time, Bards had the right to mock their betters... at least within reason. If so, it might be a breath of fresh air to allow them to do so again. Probably the Targs who shit canned that once. I hear Aegon couldn't take a joke.

Anyways, has the storm cleared?

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Post by Brian Boru Fri Oct 10, 2014 3:44 am

Rieverre wrote:I don't even bother playing fair and I've been ready for this to go sideways from the start. He's close enough to bum-rush, so I give him a full helping of MINE IS THE FURY.

I'll hit the horse on the head in passing and try to clothesline him off, then I'll draw my sword go ahead and move on the others. I'll move from one to the next without slowing too much, striking in passing and using basically every dirty trick I can think of, from feinting at them to cut at their horses, the other way around, and making myself obviously the largest threat so my own knights can take advantage of their ... preoccupation.

67

Well you manage to clock his horse, though he manages to JUST barely dodge your strike for him, it's a moot point as the horse falls over in a daze, forcing him to fight on his feet. His companions however, are ready for you. For the moment all six of them swamp you and while you're able to keep them off, you're also unable to go on the offensive.

The idiot who started this entire mess though, has turned towards your companions. Do you turn back and deal with him?

Or rely on your fellow knight to hold him off until you can level the playing field?

Either way roll a d10.



Psyckosama wrote:"Woulda been the end of me, Ser. I owe you."

Don't mention it. I plan to give him some advice once I get the chance.

He gives you a look. "Not going to ask for your hard earned coin, but I know more about how you fight than you do." he gives you a light thwap on the head, "You're not unstoppable lad, you just mummer it well enough for everyone who is not me."

I share a laugh with him.

You see one noble lady faint though...

Well if no one's with her I'll try and be the gallant knight and help the swooned lady, complete with helm.

Why not? :p

You're not giving him his shit back, are you? Or are you going to keep it. Sending a full suit of his armor down south might get a laugh.

If he asks for it I give it to him, the mad bastard might hunt me down in my tent. Otherwise I keep it.

Well, you're probably going to have to shake down a lot of bookies.

Then shake them I will.

Kevin Lannister it seems was here to represent his brother.

Umm....damn....

Alright. d10?

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The Maester looks at your ribs and points out you might be dead if you get on that horse.

Plus his grace has sent for your breastplate to be sent to one of the Red Keeps own castle smiths for a quick repair.

You impressed the shit out of him.

I thank him for his generosity, and tell him not to worry.

"Lie the fuck down, brother..."

"Yes ma'am." I lie the fuck down.

Yep. Your arm is better too.

Awesome.

Not at all creepy.

That's the point.

Anyways. It's a clean match. He didn't have a chance in hell, but the man actually can fight like a devil if forced. He goes down of course, but he goes down kicking.

As you pass the royal box after the match, you do pick up Robert muttering that he managed to not humiliate himself, which considering his a gold cloak, is good for the king. Be a bit awkward for the captain of the iron gate to seem like a complete and utter puss.

Bow of respect to my opponent, then a bow to the royal box.

Next up, the King Slayer himself! Jamie Lannister!

Snarl, for my Meal Ticket's Honor!

The arrogant peacock comes up and seems to soak it up before the crowd. He goes to the royal box, asks for his beloved sisters favor and proclaims with much drama how he's going to unmask you and gift her your helmet and have your steed snipped and set to a plow.

I actually rumble my rage at the bottom of my throat, I imagine that my helmet causes INTERESTING distortions and echos.

I lean down to my horse's ear. "Let's kick this fucking prick's ass."

Well, after the last line you can almost FEEL the murderous intent coming from Motherfucker. For the first time since you sat on his back, you're not fighting your steed as much as your enemy. This horse is creepy intelligent and right now, he wants to kick Jamie Lannister's ass.

Good. Then we're in agreement.

At the same time you feel that creepy sense of calm come over you.

Excellent

Everything is clear, and makes sense... the horse charges clear, true and with all his might, foaming with fury, you're focused and its ready to murder someone who isn't YOU for once.

Well this should be fun.

Jamie attacks with all his normal pride and confidence.

It's something of a miss match. When lances strike, there is no question. You grunt off his blow and barely slow down. Jamie on the other is sent flying ass over kettle. With one blow you sent the kingslayer flying. To put it into perspective you just hit a man half his size, with probably twice the power you did the Kingslayer.

His shield is a ruin. He actually flies 15 feet through the air and does a full loop before sliding to a rest on his front leaving a rut.

Heh...GLORIOUS

The second you make it back to the line, Motherfucker actually starts to fight you to stay on, and assuming you get off, the enraged horse walks up to the groaning man, and just as he turns over takes a long piss on his helmet before giving him a swift kick to the ribs and walking back to you, looking amazingly smug.

I let him do so.

Meanwhile there's complete and utter silence. The queen is sitting there ghost white in complete mute horror. The King is just agape. The crowd is silent.

Then Robert starts laughing his ass off. He's red faced and crying. Then the crowd breaks out in cheers so loud its deafning.

I bow with all the flair I can muster, then a thought comes to mind. I head over to my unconscious opponent, remove his helmet, then walk towards the royal box and kneel presenting Jaime's golden helm. Then making sure to pitch my voice as low as I can without sounding silly I say, "Unfortunately your brother is unable to fufil his boast due to circumstances beyond his control. I offer his helm to you in his stead and I hope it will be enough."

I then go for his horse and lead it off the field if anyone asks I say, "Looking for a plow in need of a horse."

Then I leave the field.

Two more rolls. The next round is actually the championship round. After that is the squires, who are a smaller bunch and its timmed that way so the knights have time to rest for the melee, and the winning squire will be knighted in time for the melee if the king feels they've earned it

Excellent. I have the SMUGGEST smile on my face, which I'm sure everyone I know can FEEL through my helm.

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Edd

"Vengeance is a fine wine, you can only drink it once. So savor it for it is fleeting."

Non-commital grunt.

He's had months to sharpen up.

So?

True, he squeaks, he doesn't SHRIEK

"And I travel with a Lannister. If Tywin was here, then I'd understand. I'd hope you'd be more discrete, but frankly there's nothing that could happen to him that he doesn't deserve. That man you murdered was as innocent. Never poison someone without good cause again. There's no shortage of motherfucker in these seven kingdoms, so if you're going to test your poisons, do it as an agent of justice. Not because you don't like the cut of a man's gib!"

That....actually cows her... for a moment...you later learn she NEVER loses that dreamy virgin gentile demeanor. So you might have gotten to her.

I see what you did there.

LETS GO!

Roll a d10.

I look smug in my complete ignorance.

Heh

It's the right thing to do. Smile

True.

I do change some names to protect the innocent. For example, Vizzini is from Volantis. Though Wess stays the Dread Pirate Roberts... honor the king and all. Wink

And chuckles are made from that.

As for parody and satire, I believe any man who can't take a joke is only half a man. Problem is so many lords can't.

Might be a good idea to look into some precedent. I'm sure that once upon a time, Bards had the right to mock their betters... at least within reason. If so, it might be a breath of fresh air to allow them to do so again. Probably the Targs who shit canned that once. I hear Aegon couldn't take a joke.

Even more laughter.

Anyways, has the storm cleared?

Yes it has and the water gardens are GORGEOUS! Do you swim? Normally only children do so, but no one's going to gainsay the Crown prince if he wants to catapult shot into the pools with them. Note you CAN were under clothes into the pool. Some dignity is required.

(OOC: That and nude swimming with kids is a little hinky.)
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Post by Brian Boru Fri Oct 10, 2014 3:53 am

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Post by Psyckosama Fri Oct 10, 2014 4:14 am

Brian Boru wrote:Don't mention it.  I plan to give him some advice once I get the chance.

"Thank ye, Ser... ye don't 'apppen ta be lookin' fer banners do ye m'lord?"

I share a laugh with him.

He pulls out a wine skin. "Bought some Arbor. Never had it before... though I'd treat myself. How about it, boy?"

Well if no one's with her I'll try and be the gallant knight and help the swooned lady, complete with helm.

Swooning. Much swooning.

If he asks for it I give it to him, the mad bastard might hunt me down in my tent.  Otherwise I keep it.

Oh, he wants it back alright...

Then shake them I will.

Well, would you accept your coin in trade? Not all of them have quite that much... um... liquid income.

There are several brothels on the Street of Silk if you're interested...

Umm....damn....

Yep.

10

That night you hear something rouse you from your sleep, just in time to literally catch an arm... attached to a dagger descending towards your heart.

You look up into the face of a rather shocked looking nay-do-well with a blade in hand.

"Oh fuck me..."

I thank him for his generosity, and tell him not to worry.

It's back the next morning looking like it was never even scratched.

"Yes ma'am."  I lie the fuck down.

And she tends your wounds. "So what should I tell Myranda?"

That's the point.

Heh.

Bow of respect to my opponent, then a bow to the royal box.

You get a nod back and hear the king murmer "Least the worthless fuck didn't humiliate the crown."

Snarl, for my Meal Ticket's Honor!

Heh!

I actually rumble my rage at the bottom of my throat, I imagine that my helmet causes INTERESTING distortions and echos.

He seems to ignore it while preening.

I lean down to my horse's ear. "Let's kick this fucking prick's ass."

The thing actually grunts in agreement and you feel the HATE directed at him

Good.  Then we're in agreement.

HATE!

Excellent

HATE!


Well this should be fun.

For you.

Heh...GLORIOUS



I let him do so.

If only they'd invented the Camera...

I bow with all the flair I can muster, then a thought comes to mind.  I head over to my unconscious opponent, remove his helmet, then walk towards the royal box and kneel presenting Jaime's golden helm.  Then making sure to pitch my voice as low as I can without sounding silly I say, "Unfortunately your brother is unable to fufil his boast due to circumstances beyond his control.  I offer his helm to you in his stead and I hope it will be enough."

She turns from white to red and starts to screech in rage.

"SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN, WOMAN!" Robert roars.

"But father!" Joffery cuts in, "He's humiliating our family and the crown."

"Your bloody uncle made a complete fucking arse of himself out there. The only one here who humiliated anyone is that bloody fool laying there in the great puddle of piss. Whitecloak? Bah. More like a Goldcloak now, isn't he?"

He chuckles at you. "Keep the damned helmet. Use it as a chamberpot for all I care, not like it isn't already full of piss."

Everyone starts cracking up.

I then go for his horse and lead it off the field if anyone asks I say, "Looking for a plow in need of a horse."

Then I leave the field.  

Seriously?

Lots of small folk start to cheer on... and a number are greedly looking at the steed.

It's basically the prime of westerosi horse flesh. And ironically, its actually a mare.

Motherfucker is giving you a dirty look. Don't you fucking dare send this one off...

Excellent.  I have the SMUGGEST smile on my face, which I'm sure everyone I know can FEEL through my helm.

You radiate it.

As for your next match... you are up against Ser Barristan the Bold.

I'm not going into the fine details on this one, but its a hard won match. You manage to unhorse him but your ribs are aching like the devil.

After the match he rides up next to you and nods. "Well fought, lad."

You won.

You're summoned forward and the king actually dismounts his platform and comes down to look at you.

"I've never seen a man tear through a torny like you have, Ser Knight. I'd be honored know your name if you are willing to tell..."

Edd

Non-commital grunt.

Shrug.

True, he squeaks, he doesn't SHRIEK

So how does it go over?

That....actually cows her... for a moment...you later learn she NEVER loses that dreamy virgin gentile demeanor.  So you might have gotten to her.

That moments is all I need. So, to more polite subjects.

Roll a d10.

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And chuckles are made from that.

As you wish....

Even more laughter.

"A couple generations of nutter kings will get you that. And you know the old saying about flipping a coin."

Yes it has and the water gardens are GORGEOUS!  Do you swim?  Normally only children do so, but no one's going to gainsay the Crown prince if he wants to catapult shot into the pools with them. Note you CAN were under clothes into the pool.  Some dignity is required.

I do swim. Honestly I think every city should have something akin to this...

Actually... this gets me thinking about water access and sanitation, but I don't go into that.

(OOC: That and nude swimming with kids is a little hinky.)

Yes it is.

At this point, anything else happen in Dorne and do any of the snakes try and seduce me? I do double check with Obi what to do if thy make a go for it.

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Post by Brian Boru Fri Oct 10, 2014 4:45 am

Psyckosama wrote:"Thank ye, Ser... ye don't 'apppen ta be lookin' fer banners do ye m'lord?"

"Well I might be, could certainly use a solid fellow like yourself. Just need to teach you how to actually USE that gear."

He pulls out a wine skin. "Bought some Arbor. Never had it before... though I'd treat myself. How about it, boy?"

"I'll take a swig, rather not be tipsy while on a horse."

Swooning. Much swooning.

I R...intriguing....

Oh, he wants it back alright...

Then he can have it back.

Well, would you accept your coin in trade? Not all of them have quite that much... um... liquid income.

There are several brothels on the Street of Silk if you're interested...

....I'll have to take a look to see what the goods are like but we'll talk after the tourney.

That night you hear something rouse you from your sleep, just in time to literally catch an arm... attached to a dagger descending towards your heart.

You look up into the face of a rather shocked looking nay-do-well with a blade in hand.

"Oh fuck me..."

"You done fucked up boy." DEEEP SOUTHERN ACCENT.

The next morning should find this guy beaten black and blue and hogtied and hanging from a tree branch like the world's ugliest pinata. A sign around his neck says, "Whack the assassin for a half-penny." A stick leans against the tree for such purposes. I don't delve further as I KNOW where that came from.

It's back the next morning looking like it was never even scratched.

Excellent.

And she tends your wounds. "So what should I tell Myranda?"

"You should see the other guy? No wait...wait...I'm alright, the competition is just that incredibly fierce. I'm sorry if I scare anyone."

You get a nod back and hear the king murmer "Least the worthless fuck didn't humiliate the crown."

Heh

He seems to ignore it while preening.

Just laugh it up prick.

The thing actually grunts in agreement and you feel the HATE directed at him

HATE!

HATE!

HAH

For you.

Heh true.


HA

If only they'd invented the Camera...

HAH

She turns from white to red and starts to screech in rage.

"SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN, WOMAN!" Robert roars.

"But father!" Joffery cuts in, "He's humiliating our family and the crown."

"Your bloody uncle made a complete fucking arse of himself out there. The only one here who humiliated anyone is that bloody fool laying there in the great puddle of piss. Whitecloak? Bah. More like a Goldcloak now, isn't he?"

He chuckles at you. "Keep the damned helmet. Use it as a chamberpot for all I care, not like it isn't already full of piss."

Everyone starts cracking up.

I bow again with a "As you wish your grace. And walk off with the helmet under my arm."

Seriously?

Lots of small folk start to cheer on... and a number are greedly looking at the steed.

It's basically the prime of westerosi horse flesh. And ironically, its actually a mare.

Motherfucker is giving you a dirty look. Don't you fucking dare send this one off...

I look at him, then at the other horse, then a subtle glance to the plumbing, "On second thought, I think my mount has taken a liking to the filly here. I might just keep her. The fellow's done well, needs to have SOME sort of reward himself after all."

You radiate it.

HEH

As for your next match... you are up against Ser Barristan the Bold.

I'm not going into the fine details on this one, but its a hard won match. You manage to unhorse him but your ribs are aching like the devil.

Awesome.

After the match he rides up next to you and nods. "Well fought, lad."

"Thank you Ser. You're reputation doesn't do you justice."

You won.

WOOT!

You're summoned forward and the king actually dismounts his platform and comes down to look at you.

"I've never seen a man tear through a torny like you have, Ser Knight. I'd be honored know your name if you are willing to tell..."

"You're grace is too kind. But I have a confession to make." I reach up to take my helmet off. Once it's off I continue. "I'm merely a squire your grace. My name is Durren....Durren Stone of the Gate of the Moon. It has been a long time since I've seen you...Father."



Edd

So how does it go over?

Well later on you notice the two of them are talking with each other, you think about the virtues of the spear vs. the hammer. Both arguing vehemently for their side, but seeming to enjoy the argument.

That moments is all I need. So, to more polite subjects.

Well she does seem to be a bit more...attentive when you're nearby.

[quote]3[/roll]

Well after a bit of ranging about you manage to come across a pair of mature bucks, beautiful creatures. You both have a spear ready, as that's the tradition with hunting these creatures as they're too fast to chase or hunt with a horse.

Who gets the first cast? Either way roll 2d10.

As you wish....

"My Lady."

"A couple generations of nutter kings will get you that. And you know the old saying about flipping a coin."

"With the last few generations they seemed to just grab it out of the air and slap it down on mad."

I do swim. Honestly I think every city should have something akin to this...

Actually... this gets me thinking about water access and sanitation, but I don't go into that.

Well soon most of the sand snakes leap in as well, save for Tyene, she seems a bit too....sedate for this sort of thing. Arriane looks on enviously, she hasn't done something like this in a long while.

Yes it is.

At this point, anything else happen in Dorne and do any of the snakes try and seduce me? I do double check with Obi what to do if thy make a go for it.

Well you might have gotten Poison girl's interest.

Roll a d100 for how bad she has it for you.
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Post by Rieverre Fri Oct 10, 2014 4:51 am

Brian Boru wrote:Well you manage to clock his horse, though he manages to JUST barely dodge your strike for him, it's a moot point as the horse falls over in a daze, forcing him to fight on his feet.  His companions however, are ready for you.  For the moment all six of them swamp you and while you're able to keep them off, you're also unable to go on the offensive.

The idiot who started this entire mess though, has turned towards your companions.  Do you turn back and deal with him?

Or rely on your fellow knight to hold him off until you can level the playing field?

Either way roll a d10.

Well, let's see ... one of him, dismounted. Against two guys who've sparred with me pretty regularly, are still mounted, and Mya at the wagon(s) ... yeah, I'm tying up his companions, fighting like I did in the melee - which, come to think of it, was pretty good preparation for this. Certainly, I know how to deal with many-on-one situations on horseback better after than I have before.

... and I preface my hit and run at them with the contents of my brace of throwing daggers, much like I did during that first ambush when we were heading to the Crownlands, aimed at man or horse, whichever presents an easier target at the moment.
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Post by Dice Bot Fri Oct 10, 2014 4:51 am

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Post by Psyckosama Fri Oct 10, 2014 5:09 am

Brian Boru wrote:"Well I might be, could certainly use a solid fellow like yourself.  Just need to teach you how to actually USE that gear."

He looks like you made his century.

"I'll take a swig, rather not be tipsy while on a horse."

It's good. Very very good.

I R...intriguing....

You're so... KNIGHTLY :p

Then he can have it back.

Yeah, but do you make him PAY?

....I'll have to take a look to see what the goods are like but we'll talk after the tourney.

Only the finest, he assures you...

"You done fucked up boy."  DEEEP SOUTHERN ACCENT.

The next morning should find this guy beaten black and blue and hogtied and hanging from a tree branch like the world's ugliest pinata.  A sign around his neck says, "Whack the assassin for a half-penny."  A stick leans against the tree for such purposes.  I don't delve further as I KNOW where that came from.

He's willing to sell out his bosses for his life and teeth...

"You should see the other guy?  No wait...wait...I'm alright, the competition is just that incredibly fierce.  I'm sorry if I scare anyone."

She nods. She'll tell her.

I bow again with a "As you wish your grace.  And walk off with the helmet under my arm."

Cersei's HATE almost makes your armor burn.

I look at him, then at the other horse, then a subtle glance to the plumbing, "On second thought, I think my mount has taken a liking to the filly here.  I might just keep her.  The fellow's done well, needs to have SOME sort of reward himself after all."

The king cracks up at that.

Awesome.

Yep. A fine display of the knights art. You win via sheer endurance. You can't unhorse oneanother due to pure skill and power respectively, but you wear him down until he's long longer able to hold on.

"Thank you Ser.  You're reputation doesn't do you justice."

"I'd like to see what becomes of you in a few more years."

"You're grace is too kind.  But I have a confession to make."  I reach up to take my helmet off.  Once it's off I continue.  "I'm merely a squire your grace.  My name is Durren....Durren Stone of the Gate of the Moon.  It has been a long time since I've seen you...Father."

He goes mute and shock passes through the entire field until...

"CEASE THAT FOUL BASTARD!" the queen roars, "HOW DARE YOU HUMILIATE THIS CROWN AND THIS HOUSE WITH YOUR..."

"SILENCE WENCH!"

Robert has turned about and is glaring at her with a level of rage that makes even her shut up. "My wife is obvious unwell. Take her to Maidenvault... I think the calm will help her nerves..."

She opens her mouth to retort but he growls. "You have said enough. GUARDS!"

She's escorted off the field, while silence reigns.

He turns back to you. "And as for you boy..."

He laughs and his rage slips away and he walks up to you and claps his hands on your shoulders. "God's you've grown boy... gods you've grown. Fucking hell. And still a squire you say? Kneel!"

He looks over to Barristan. "Give me your sword, man..."

Assuming you kneel.

"In the name of the Warrior I charge you to be brave."
"In the name of the Father I charge you to be just."
"In the name of the Mother I charge you to defend the young and innocent."
"In the name of the Maid I charge you to protect all women."
"I, Robert Baratheon the First of my Name, King of the Andals, the Rhoynar and the First Men, Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, Protector of the Realm here by proclaim my natural born son, Durran Stone to be a Knight. Rise, Ser Durran!"

The cheers are deafing.

Menawhile Joffery is looking on at you with a BURNING rage.

Edd

Well later on you notice the two of them are talking with each other, you think about the virtues of the spear vs. the hammer.  Both arguing vehemently for their side, but seeming to enjoy the argument.

Heh.

Well she does seem to be a bit more...attentive when you're nearby.

Heh. Well, I think I at least earned her respect. So I charge her with finding 10 men in the city and presenting their names and crimes to me. Go for the ones who are guilty as sin, but cannot be punished due to their connections. Lets see if we can turn her into a medieval batman with toxins. Wink

Well after a bit of ranging about you manage to come across a pair of mature bucks, beautiful creatures.  You both have a spear ready, as that's the tradition with hunting these creatures as they're too fast to chase or hunt with a horse.

Who gets the first cast?  Either way roll 2d10.

Robert is the king, but I'll let them decide.

Psyckosama carried out 2 launched of one d100 :
58 , 49

"My Lady."

Heh.

"With the last few generations they seemed to just grab it out of the air and slap it down on mad."

Sadly yes. I mean, Aerys at least had the excuse of a really fucked up situation driving him around the bend. Rhaegar was just a moron. I mean first, he was married to Elia a woman famed for her wit and beauty who'd already borne him two healthy and beautiful children.... but that's not enough for him so he kidnaped the daughter of a fucking Lord Paramount. Not a small folk, not a regular lord, but a lord paramount... who was openly betrothed to... another lord paramount. Even from a logical standpoint, the sheer level of STUPID that requires simply boggles the mind."

Well soon most of the sand snakes leap in as well, save for Tyene, she seems a bit too....sedate for this sort of thing.  Arriane looks on enviously, she hasn't done something like this in a long while.

"Don't fight the urge, m'lady."

Well you might have gotten Poison girl's interest.

And you hinted at knife girl's. Others are simply too young.


Roll a d100 for how bad she has it for you.

Oh dear...

Psyckosama carried out 1 launched of one d100 :
7

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Post by Brian Boru Sat Oct 11, 2014 3:02 am

Rieverre wrote:Well, let's see ... one of him, dismounted. Against two guys who've sparred with me pretty regularly, are still mounted, and Mya at the wagon(s) ... yeah, I'm tying up his companions, fighting like I did in the melee - which, come to think of it, was pretty good preparation for this. Certainly, I know how to deal with many-on-one situations on horseback better after than I have before.

... and I preface my hit and run at them with the contents of my brace of throwing daggers, much like I did during that first ambush when we were heading to the Crownlands, aimed at man or horse, whichever presents an easier target at the moment.

4

Very well then, you turn back towards the six and press the attack.

Both daggers bite home, one of them into the throat of one attacker. As he drops you draw you sword and dispatch the other injured man. Now it's 4 on 1, much better odds. You bring down another two before the last two break off and run. Do you give chase?



Psyckosama wrote:He looks like you made his century.

Heh

It's good. Very very good.

Interesting

You're so... KNIGHTLY :p

HAH!....gods I hope Myranda didn't see that.

Yeah, but do you make him PAY?

You know what? No, I beat him, he beat the shit out of me. We're even. Free of ransom.

Only the finest, he assures you...

If they're all toothless wonders....I'll be peeved.

He's willing to sell out his bosses for his life and teeth...

Alright, who was it and I'll let you go, after a couple of kids have a chance to whack. Nothing permanent, just don't do that shit again.

She nods. She'll tell her.

"Thanks."

Cersei's HATE almost makes your armor burn.

I could use it to cook an egg couldn't I?

The king cracks up at that.

I chuckle, and I'm sure the mare is near panicing having that lunatic being amorous about her.

Yep. A fine display of the knights art. You win via sheer endurance. You can't unhorse oneanother due to pure skill and power respectively, but you wear him down until he's long longer able to hold on.

Kool

"I'd like to see what becomes of you in a few more years."

"We'll see then won't we."

He goes mute and shock passes through the entire field until...

"CEASE THAT FOUL BASTARD!" the queen roars, "HOW DARE YOU HUMILIATE THIS CROWN AND THIS HOUSE WITH YOUR..."

"SILENCE WENCH!"

Robert has turned about and is glaring at her with a level of rage that makes even her shut up. "My wife is obvious unwell. Take her to Maidenvault... I think the calm will help her nerves..."

She opens her mouth to retort but he growls. "You have said enough. GUARDS!"

She's escorted off the field, while silence reigns.

He turns back to you. "And as for you boy..."

He laughs and his rage slips away and he walks up to you and claps his hands on your shoulders. "God's you've grown boy... gods you've grown. Fucking hell. And still a squire you say? Kneel!"

He looks over to Barristan. "Give me your sword, man..."

Assuming you kneel.

I do.

"In the name of the Warrior I charge you to be brave."
"In the name of the Father I charge you to be just."
"In the name of the Mother I charge you to defend the young and innocent."
"In the name of the Maid I charge you to protect all women."
"I, Robert Baratheon the First of my Name, King of the Andals, the Rhoynar and the First Men, Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, Protector of the Realm here by proclaim my natural born son, Durran Stone to be a Knight. Rise, Ser Durran!"

The cheers are deafing.

Menawhile Joffery is looking on at you with a BURNING rage.

Well this is certainly...daunting, I mean this was the entire plan but it's still HUGE....

I wave and bow respectively to the prince. I'm just going to LAP. IT. UP! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!

Then in a low voice I mutter to the king..."what now...'father'?"

Huh wonder how many of those invitations will still be standing after my little...revelation?



Edd

Heh. Well, I think I at least earned her respect. So I charge her with finding 10 men in the city and presenting their names and crimes to me. Go for the ones who are guilty as sin, but cannot be punished due to their connections. Lets see if we can turn her into a medieval batman with toxins. Wink

She has them five hours later....she's fast....and she almost preens when you mention the speed.

Robert is the king, but I'll let them decide.

58, 49

Well Robert throws...and misses, yours hits its target, but only a flesh wound and it's quickly sprinting away. You've got another throw before they're both gone. You throw?

Which one do you go for?

If you throw roll a d100.

[quote]"Sadly yes. I mean, Aerys at least had the excuse of a really fucked up situation driving him around the bend. Rhaegar was just a moron. I mean first, he was married to Elia a woman famed for her wit and beauty who'd already borne him two healthy and beautiful children.... but that's not enough for him so he kidnaped the daughter of a fucking Lord Paramount. Not a small folk, not a regular lord, but a lord paramount... who was openly betrothed to... another lord paramount. Even from a logical standpoint, the sheer level of STUPID that requires simply boggles the mind."

Robert actually snarls at that and grim looks spread over the faces of the brothers, you're reminded that Elia WAS their sister who was insulted and later killed because of Rhaegar's foolishness.

"Don't fight the urge, m'lady."

A quick glance from her father and she's quickly in an interesting two piece wrapping....and it's GLORIOUS on her. She flings herself into the pool. Obara soon after, not bothering with propriety.

And you hinted at knife girl's. Others are simply too young.

Knife just thinks you're pretty.

Oh dear...

7

Well there aren't maids dying for giggling about you but she's ALWAYS THERE!
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Post by Psyckosama Sat Oct 11, 2014 3:37 am

Brian Boru wrote:HAH!....gods I hope Myranda didn't see that.

She did. Smile

You know what?  No, I beat him, he beat the shit out of me.  We're even.  Free of ransom.

She man sneers and takes his shit back

If they're all toothless wonders....I'll be peeved.

Would you like a tour?

Alright, who was it and I'll let you go, after a couple of kids have a chance to whack.  Nothing permanent, just don't do that shit again.

Hey, he's just a fatherless sod from Fleebottom. Many's gotta make his coin somehow. How's killin' a man for a noble lord different than doin' it for a crime lord. Both are simply folk takin' one man's coin to end another man's life!

"Thanks."

Nod.

I could use it to cook an egg couldn't I?

Yep. World's first solar oven.

I chuckle, and I'm sure the mare is near panicing having that lunatic being amorous about her.

She's a horse.

"We'll see then won't we."

"That we will."
Well this is certainly...daunting, I mean this was the entire plan but it's still HUGE....

I wave and bow respectively to the prince.  I'm just going to LAP. IT. UP!  HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!

Cold glare. God, this kid is CREEPY.

Then in a low voice I mutter to the king..."what now...'father'?"

"Well first, your prize!" he motion to a chest of gold, "But seeing how much you've won with your bets, It's probably doesn't look like the fine sum it did when you first arrived now does it!"

there's a laugh.

"Now, choose your Queen of Love and Beauty! Then join me in the box, lad, we have the room..."

Cersei's throne is replaced with a just as comfortable but slightly less ostentatious chair.

Huh wonder how many of those invitations will still be standing after my little...revelation?

All of them actually. You're now a man to know for other reasons.

Then the Mystery Knight's Mystery Squire is announced and everyone WTFs a bit.

"Mystery Squire," the king mutters, "That's new..." he chews on it for a moment. "Let this mystery squire compete!"

He glances over. "Moves like a woman, that one. See it in the hips..." he pauses and gives you a look then sighs. "It's your ruddy sister, sin't it?"

Joffery sneers. "You're letting a... girl... compete in my name day torny?!"

Robert soffs. "Boy, that girl is your own blood sister. Think of it this way, lad. One day they will be your banners and it'll be prove to all of these fucks that there is no family stronger. A little reminder who's the fucking king."

Edd

She has them five hours later....she's fast....and she almost preens when you mention the speed.

"Good girl." I smile and pat her on the head. "Now, lets plan out some vigilante justice."

I thinks I've found the first of my spymasters.

Well Robert throws...and misses, yours hits its target, but only a flesh wound and it's quickly sprinting away.  You've got another throw before they're both gone.  You throw?

The Injured one should be slower, so I target the faster of the two.

Yes. Then I start in a full run after Robert makes his second, snatch up my discarded spear and try and throw it in full run to kill the other. Because, over the top awesome.

Psyckosama carried out 2 launched of one d100 :
61 , 10

Robert actually snarls at that and grim looks spread over the faces of the brothers, you're reminded that Elia WAS their sister who was insulted and later killed because of Rhaegar's foolishness.

Intentionally. Gives everyone here something to agree on. The man was a fucking waste of flesh who's ineptitude lead to the deaths of every woman he touched.

A quick glance from her father and she's quickly in an interesting two piece wrapping....and it's GLORIOUS on her.  She flings herself into the pool.  Obara soon after, not bothering with propriety.

"Bah, come on..." I look at the king and princes. "You're only old when you decide to stop being young!"

Knife just thinks you're pretty.

Ah.

Well there aren't maids dying for giggling about you but she's ALWAYS THERE!

Well, I do compliment her on her talents and speak with her father. How much training does she have in managing agents and spies? I mean personally she's extremely capable, but as he knows I'm looking for spymasters who will be loyal to me. So I need her to be more than just a single skilled individual. Can she be that?

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Post by Rieverre Sat Oct 11, 2014 4:10 am

Brian Boru wrote:Very well then, you turn back towards the six and press the attack.

Both daggers bite home, one of them into the throat of one attacker.  As he drops you draw you sword and dispatch the other injured man.  Now it's 4 on 1, much better odds.  You bring down another two before the last two break off and run.  Do you give chase?

... why would I give chase? I have a perfectly serviceable weirwood bow and they're opening the distance. I take a glance back at the guy I dismounted and if he's been taken care of by the rest of my party (or the matter looks like it's under control), I send a couple of arrows at the feeling duo. I should at least be able to bring down their horses.

If there are any attackers alive by the end of this, even if wounded, I'll want to make sure they stay that way for a little while at least. I do kind of want to interrogate them, as this whole matter escalated _far_ too quickly to have been truly random.
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Post by Brian Boru Sun Oct 12, 2014 1:23 am

Psyckosama wrote:She did. Smile

Darn

She man sneers and takes his shit back

Jackass...

Would you like a tour?

Making sure no one's with me I MIGHT visit....later.

Hey, he's just a fatherless sod from Fleebottom. Many's gotta make his coin somehow. How's killin' a man for a noble lord different than doin' it for a crime lord. Both are simply folk takin' one man's coin to end another man's life!

I toss him a stag, "Find something else. Assassin ain't you calling."

Yep. World's first solar oven.

HAH

She's a horse.

Ah mine's a special case then.

"That we will."

Heh

Cold glare. God, this kid is CREEPY.

I make sure to sleep with one eye open.

"Well first, your prize!" he motion to a chest of gold, "But seeing how much you've won with your bets, It's probably doesn't look like the fine sum it did when you first arrived now does it!"

there's a laugh.

I laugh with him, "Every bit helps. I certainly won't say no to it."

"Now, choose your Queen of Love and Beauty! Then join me in the box, lad, we have the room..."

Cersei's throne is replaced with a just as comfortable but slightly less ostentatious chair.

Once I got the flower crown I look for Myranda and present the crown to her. Once I get to her I make sure to say, "There's not a woman alive I'd rather give this to."

I then head for the seat next to Robert.

All of them actually. You're now a man to know for other reasons.

Even Tywin? Ok then....might want to answer some of them. (OOC: I can't imagine I'd be as lucky as you. So I'll need the political connections. Honestly wouldn't want it kinda want a challenge of it.)

Then the Mystery Knight's Mystery Squire is announced and everyone WTFs a bit.

"Mystery Squire," the king mutters, "That's new..." he chews on it for a moment. "Let this mystery squire compete!"

He glances over. "Moves like a woman, that one. See it in the hips..." he pauses and gives you a look then sighs. "It's your ruddy sister, sin't it?"

"Yes...she insisted I teach her and she took to it like a duck to water."

Joffery sneers. "You're letting a... girl... compete in my name day torny?!"

Robert soffs. "Boy, that girl is your own blood sister. Think of it this way, lad. One day they will be your banners and it'll be prove to all of these fucks that there is no family stronger. A little reminder who's the fucking king."

I chuckle and sit back and watch her go.



Edd

"Good girl." I smile and pat her on the head. "Now, lets plan out some vigilante justice."

I thinks I've found the first of my spymasters.

Heh. Anything is particular you want to do?

The Injured one should be slower, so I target the faster of the two.

Yes. Then I start in a full run after Robert makes his second, snatch up my discarded spear and try and throw it in full run to kill the other. Because, over the top awesome.

61, 10

You're first shot misses the beast. Then Robert tries his luck and nails the one you injure. It goes down in a heap.

With an incredible speed you hurl the first spear and nail the uninjured beast, the beast is dead before it even hits the ground.

Intentionally. Gives everyone here something to agree on. The man was a fucking waste of flesh who's ineptitude lead to the deaths of every woman he touched.

AMEN TO THAT. Is the general concession, they're a bit surprised at that.

"Bah, come on..." I look at the king and princes. "You're only old when you decide to stop being young!"

Robert and Oberyn both hurl themselves in, Doran's...still a bit to creaky for that but he does ease himself into one of the smaller pools.

Well, I do compliment her on her talents and speak with her father. How much training does she have in managing agents and spies? I mean personally she's extremely capable, but as he knows I'm looking for spymasters who will be loyal to me. So I need her to be more than just a single skilled individual. Can she be that?

Well she can certainly do cunning, she's been a mole in a few endeavors she and her sisters have done with spectacular success.



Rieverre wrote:... why would I give chase? I have a perfectly serviceable weirwood bow and they're opening the distance. I take a glance back at the guy I dismounted and if he's been taken care of by the rest of my party (or the matter looks like it's under control), I send a couple of arrows at the feeling duo. I should at least be able to bring down their horses.

The instigator of this bullsh*t is down, whether dead or not, you can't tell.

You draw your bow back and loose the two arrows in rapid sucession. Both times the a horse tumbles over, their riders being thrown off of their seats to tumble along the hard road. You think one of them at least is still alive.

If there are any attackers alive by the end of this, even if wounded, I'll want to make sure they stay that way for a little while at least. I do kind of want to interrogate them, as this whole matter escalated _far_ too quickly to have been truly random.

Well after checking you find the idiot who started this is alive, though beaten and bruised. When you check the runners, you learn that one of them is still alive. You eventually learn the man was merely a third son of a sworn sword, and yes he really was THAT big of a hothead...you think. You'll have to interrogate the other man when he comes to.

Roll a d100 for how he recovers.
Brian Boru
Brian Boru

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Join date : 2012-08-04
Age : 34

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Stags of the Mountains: You in the A Song of Ice and Fire BROB: With a Bonus! - Page 3 Empty Re: Stags of the Mountains: You in the A Song of Ice and Fire BROB: With a Bonus!

Post by Psyckosama Sun Oct 12, 2014 2:04 am

Brian Boru wrote:Darn

She doesn't seem to be too pissed though.

Jackass...

More murdering psychopathic rapist

Making sure no one's with me I MIGHT visit....later.

Heh.

I toss him a stag, "Find something else.  Assassin ain't you calling."

Oi now, he's pretty good at this trade!

And seein' how his bosses are going to nail his ball to a tree for failing this, you in the need of a man who's quick with a knife?

So, Waters?

Ah mine's a special case then.

Yes. No mere animal could contain that much pure evil and not cross over to some level of sentiances.

Seriously, its like a demon in horseflesh.

I make sure to sleep with one eye open.

You mean you don't already?

HOW many times has someone tried to kill you in your sleep? Within the last week?"

I laugh with him, "Every bit helps.  I certainly won't say no to it."

He laughs. "That's the spirit, boy."

Once I got the flower crown I look for Myranda and present the crown to her.  Once I get to her I make sure to say, "There's not a woman alive I'd rather give this to."

She accepts it and swoons. Then leaps forward and gives you a kiss.

Robert is laughing his ass off. Her brother just scowls then sighs.

I then head for the seat next to Robert.

"Fine one you got there, lad. Just look at the pair on her! So who is she?"

Even Tywin?  Ok then....might want to answer some of them.  (OOC: I can't imagine I'd be as lucky as you. So I'll need the political connections. Honestly wouldn't want it kinda want a challenge of it.)

Kevin. Tywin's not around and Kevin's less of a cruel, vengeful, humorless egomaniacal asshole than his brother.

"Yes...she insisted I teach her and she took to it like a duck to water."

He sighs. "I ain't knightin' her."

I chuckle and sit back and watch her go.

She kicks ass and actually wins. It's only a 30 dragon prize, but that's enough to kit out a squire as a proper knight. And considering that its tradition to knight the squire at the end, they often need it.

Robert comes forward and sighs. "Alright lass, you can take your bloody helmet off now."

There's a gasp then Mya removes her helmet to more gasps.

"Father," she says calmly. "What gave me away?"

"You walk like a woman," he replies then sighs, "Bloody hell. Haven't see you since you were a slip of a girl."

He shakes his head. "My natural born daughter, Mya Stone. Twin to that one over there..." he thumbs you and laughs, "And I ain't bloody knighting ye girl so don't ask. But you can join us in the box tomorrow."

He hands her the purse. "You earned this reward. My girl. Not a boy her age who could stand against her in good looks nor strength of arms...." he then chuckles, "So name your... 'Queen'" he starts to laugh, "Of love and beauty!"

She takes her crown and looks at the others squires.

Then scowls. "Mycheal, if you don't stop trying to slink away, then by the seven... you'll either take this damned crown or I'll see you in the joust."

Reluctantly Mychel Redfort makes his way towards the center... flushing as laughter fills the field.

"Oh hold your head up, boy!" Robert laughs, as Mya "crowns" her "Queen of Love and Beauty."

"I am never going to live this down," he mutters to himself.

"There are far worse fates than being favored by a king's daughter," Robert points out. "Both of you, and my boy of course will be joining me at the Red Keep for dinner."

He looks over to you for a moment, "And bring you master and your queen. I'd like to meet the man who could turn my son into the strongest knight in the land and the girl that my boy has an eye for."

Edd

Heh.  Anything is particular you want to do?

I want to see how she handles this. I want to rate her plans and watch her execute them, giving suggestions as she does so.

You're first shot misses the beast.  Then Robert tries his luck and nails the one you injure.  It goes down in a heap.

With an incredible speed you hurl the first spear and nail the uninjured beast, the beast is dead before it even hits the ground.

"I softened it up for you," I laugh. "Well we know what's for dinner tonight. And these antlers would look nice on a helmet, don't you think?"

AMEN TO THAT.  Is the general concession, they're a bit surprised at that.

Hm. Had an idea for a yearly celebration. Every year, to commemorate the the son of a bitch's death, make a big ruby red dragon of hard candy then smash it with a hammer and hand the fragments out to the children. Maybe serve the bits with decorative green forks. Bit more ironic than burning an effigy and its something that the children will enjoy. We could call it smashing the Rhaegar.

Now I'm tempted to invent the pinata! Very Happy

Robert and Oberyn both hurl themselves in, Doran's...still a bit to creaky for that but he does ease himself into one of the smaller pools.

I smile at Doran and when I have a moment settle next to him. "Thank you for being such a gracious host. I know that hospitality demands nothing less, but there's a difference between the demands of polite society and true and honest welcome, and for that I thank you."

Well she can certainly do cunning, she's been a mole in a few endeavors she and her sisters have done with spectacular success.

She has a good start and her family are great.

Psyckosama
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