Stags of the Mountains: You in the A Song of Ice and Fire BROB: With a Bonus!

Brian Boru wrote:That to.

Though the most physical I ever get with my sister is HUGS.

Fucking freaks.

And a demure smile.

Wink!

Now there's a thought.

Just think of it... people will pay you just to teach them how to swing a sword without cutting their arms off... and you could hire others who you think have some talent at teaching to teach the dregs and poor little rich kids while you focus your efforts on the ones who can be made great.

She's a bit surprised...and impressed...she hands you a hunting horn.  If you blow on it, it wakes the critters right up and they begin blopping towards the water.

I charge the big one!

Psyckosama carried out 1 launched of one d10 :

2

Psyckosama wrote:Though the most physical I ever get with my sister is HUGS.

Fucking freaks.

Indeed.

Wink!

Careful...you might get an egagement.

Just think of it... people will pay you just to teach them how to swing a sword without cutting their arms off... and you could hire others who you think have some talent at teaching to teach the dregs and poor little rich kids while you focus your efforts on the ones who can be made great.

Interested...willing to test out...start small rinse and repeat.

I charge the big one!

2

The huge beast takes the spear like a champ though you KNOW you hurt it bad it still has a ton of fight left in it. Do you get another harpoon or something else.

Elsewhere Dacy and the others are going after other members of the group.

Brian Boru wrote:Careful...you might get an egagement.

Not high-born enough.

Besides, according to her mother Mormount women are all shapechangers and they mate with bears

Interested...willing to test out...start small rinse and repeat.

When the time comes, well, I'll get you started.

The huge beast takes the spear like a champ though you KNOW you hurt it bad it still has a ton of fight left in it.  Do you get another harpoon or something else.

Elsewhere Dacy and the others are going after other members of the group.

I close in with my axes and plant one right between its eyes.

Psyckosama carried out 1 launched of one d10 :

4

Psyckosama wrote:Not high-born enough.

Maybe but can you think of a better suited woman for you?

Besides, according to her mother Mormount women are all shapechangers and they mate with bears

Give it a few years and the Baratheon partially shaved ape genes http://www.boardwalksurf.co.uk/media/HairyGuy.jpg will kick in so you might be hairy enough by then.

In case you're wondering Renly...wax....LOTS AND LOTS OF WAX!

I close in with my axes and plant one right between its eyes.

4

The beast rumbles in pain and drops dead to the beach, looking around, you see that Dacy and another hunter managed to bring down a cow, the others managed to slip into the sea.

Brian Boru wrote:Maybe but can you think of a better suited woman for you?

Not really.

I have to consider fucking politics.

My hope at least is for her to become my paramour.

Give it a few years and the Baratheon partially shaved ape genes http://www.boardwalksurf.co.uk/media/HairyGuy.jpg will kick in so you might be hairy enough by then.

In case you're wondering Renly...wax....LOTS AND LOTS OF WAX!

Real funny...

The beast rumbles in pain and drops dead to the beach, looking around, you see that Dacy and another hunter managed to bring down a cow, the others managed to slip into the sea.

I wave to the others and wrench the weapon free. "So, how do you cook these things?" I ask with a giant silly smile on my face.

[quote="Brian Boru"]Actually your save is done with such skill agility and brilliance it'd make a Dothraki cry in shame at being outdone. Nearly the entire crowd roars out in cheer at your horsemanship.

You were knocked backwards out of your seat your butt is past the horse's tail. But at the last second your arm shoots out grabs the back of your saddle and with one arm you wrench yourself back into your seat perfect as if you were never hit with one swift, fluid, and perfectly natural wrench of your arm.

The entire stands are howling in awe and amazement at the trick, the king roaring louder than any other. The queen is seething.

As the two of you ride back to your spots, old Semly claps you on the shoulder and says, "Excellent horsemanship lad."

"Thank you," I reply in passing. "It was an excellent blow, ser."

You both get a lance in hand and now you ride down the lists again.

Roll a d10.

Yeah, now I'm tempted to be cautious, but chances are that with his skill he can likely as not outlast me as well. I only have a single thought on my mind at the moment, and that's how to put Barristan Selmy out of the saddle - ending this quickly, so he can't fully grasp how much I'm relying on talent and luck and natural advantages over skill, experience and training.

The member 'Rieverre' has done the following action : Dice Roller

'd10' : 1

Brian Boru wrote:

Silver Sun 17 wrote:"I've been well, and I've been quite successful in my endeavors."

That's good that's very good lad.

I give in, no point in even trying to disagree.

You're immediately swept into the royal party, Robert insists that you ride along side him, he continues to drink from a skin while he asks what you have done since he left to fight against Aerys.

I tell him of how i grew up with some focus on how I became a squire and my frist battle.

Psyckosama wrote:Not really.

I have to consider fucking politics.

My hope at least is for her to become my paramour.

Heh

Real funny...

I try.

I wave to the others and wrench the weapon free. "So, how do you cook these things?" I ask with a giant silly smile on my face.

"Very slowly." Is the repsonse. Several horses are then brought to drag the massive carcasses back to the Mormont's hall. The tusks of the bull you killed are given to you as trophies for the hunt. What do you do with them?

Rieverre wrote:"Thank you," I reply in passing. "It was an excellent blow, ser."

He nods and the two of you head back to your respective places.

Yeah, now I'm tempted to be cautious, but chances are that with his skill he can likely as not outlast me as well. I only have a single thought on my mind at the moment, and that's how to put Barristan Selmy out of the saddle - ending this quickly, so he can't fully grasp how much I'm relying on talent and luck and natural advantages over skill, experience and training.

1

This final strike...is as if the Warrior himself had replaced you in that moment. It is a perfect blow, struck with a force that defies explanation. Selmy, though one of the greatest knights that ever lived, shoots backwards off his horse like a cork from a wine bottle. He actually skips and skids along the ground like a stone thrown across a lake. He finally comes to a stop 2/3rds the way back to his starting spot. Groaning and thrashing a bit, but still alive.

There is a moment of silence followed by a gasp as everyone takes in their breath, then your eardrums pop when the entire stadium explodes in cheering for a blow that will go down in history as the "Indomitable Blow." Robert Baratheon was roaring louder than anyone else there. As for the ladies of the noble houses...now you know what it was like to be a Beetle.

Silver Sun 17 wrote:I tell him of how i grew up with some focus on how I became a squire and my frist battle.

He seems QUITE impressed, laughing, congratulating and cheering at appropriate places. Then he claps you on the shoulder and says that such a mighty warrior should serve in a court that matches his skills. He declares you a retainer in his house and will knight you if it's needed.

Brian Boru wrote:"Very slowly."  Is the repsonse.  Several horses are then brought to drag the massive carcasses back to the Mormont's hall.  The tusks of the bull you killed are given to you as trophies for the hunt.  What do you do with them?

Unless m'lady has a better suggestion, I'm going to send them back to King's Landing to have Tobho Mott turn them into the hilts of a pair of finely crafted daggers.

I like to actually make use of my trophies. They do no good sitting on a wall, and I think they'll look quite fine being worn along with my Shadowcat Cloak.

Psyckosama wrote:Unless m'lady has a better suggestion, I'm going to send them back to King's Landing to have Tobho Mott turn them into the hilts of a pair of finely crafted daggers.

No one has any issue with that.

I like to actually make use of my trophies. They do no good sitting on a wall, and I think they'll look quite fine being worn along with my Shadowcat Cloak.

People soon start calling you Eddard the Hunter after that and you get the feeling the name will stick for a long, long time.

The next few days are an interesting one, you can add another notch to your belt with the claiming of one Dacy Mormont, who also joins your Grand Tour, Robert allows this, considering he KNOWS what you and her are doing behind closed doors, though he does say that she needs to break off once they head back into the Riverlands. Now onto a boat and onwards to the Iron Islands.

Roll d100.

Brian Boru wrote:This final strike...is as if the Warrior himself had replaced you in that moment.  It is a perfect blow, struck with a force that defies explanation.  Selmy, though one of the greatest knights that ever lived, shoots backwards off his horse like a cork from a wine bottle.  He actually skips and skids along the ground like a stone thrown across a lake.  He finally comes to a stop 2/3rds the way back to his starting spot.  Groaning and thrashing a bit, but still alive.

There is a moment of silence followed by a gasp as everyone takes in their breath, then your eardrums pop when the entire stadium explodes in cheering for a blow that will go down in history as the "Indomitable Blow."  Robert Baratheon was roaring louder than anyone else there.  As for the ladies of the noble houses...now you know what it was like to be a Beetle.

I'm as surprised as anyone else at that working out so well, but I try not to show it, instead heading over to Selmy and offering him a hand up. The gesture costs me nothing and returns previous courtesy, plus, it seems like the thing to do.

As for the noble ladies ... well, bonus!

Or potential future hazard. Possibly both. Any reactions from the rest of the royal section?

Brian Boru wrote:


He seems QUITE impressed, laughing, congratulating and cheering at appropriate places.  Then he claps you on the shoulder and says that such a mighty warrior should serve in a court that matches his skills.  He declares you a retainer in his house and will knight you if it's needed.

I look overwhelmed for a moment. then i school my features.
"Thank You father."

Brian Boru wrote:No one has any issue with that.

Very nice.

People soon start calling you Eddard the Hunter after that and you get the feeling the name will stick for a long, long time.

As far as names go it could be a lot worse...

The next few days are an interesting one, you can add another notch to your belt with the claiming of one Dacy Mormont, who also joins your Grand Tour, Robert allows this, considering he KNOWS what you and her are doing behind closed doors, though he does say that she needs to break off once they head back into the Riverlands.  Now onto a boat and onwards to the Iron Islands.

I'd like to make an agreement with her, her mother, and my father if they're open to it.

I know the women of her family tend to be shy on marriage, normally chosing to take lovers rather than husbands as to keep their independence.

I'm extremely fond of Dacy and if it was at all politically reasonable I'd be sorely tempted to ask her to put that family custom to the side... but as far as reality goes I'd like to make the following arrangement for all of our sakes. If she should take with child as a result of our shared affections... I will recognize the child, and if they'll agree to it, I want to see that the child be honorably legitimized as a child of her house.

Basically if I was marrying only for love, I'd be totally smitten... but I have political duties and the most I can offer her is a place as the prince's paramour... according the Dorneish tradition, which actually does make it a rather high placed rank.

Roll d100.

Psyckosama carried out 1 launched of one d100 :

3

Rieverre wrote:I'm as surprised as anyone else at that working out so well, but I try not to show it, instead heading over to Selmy and offering him a hand up. The gesture costs me nothing and returns previous courtesy, plus, it seems like the thing to do.

He has a busted collar bone but otherwise is fine. He thanks you for the gesture.

As for the noble ladies ... well, bonus!

Heh

Or potential future hazard. Possibly both. Any reactions from the rest of the royal section?

You can feel the waves of HAAAAAAAAATEEEEEEEEE coming off of Cersei.

Robert then calls you in front of him, he declares you the champion and gives you the prize of 1000 gold Dragons. Then he asks if he could learn the identity of the mystery knight. He knows that tradition allows you to deny him that but satisfy his curiosity if you could. EVERYONE leans forward to hear and see your reaction.

Silver Sun 17 wrote:I look overwhelmed for a moment. then i school my features.
"Thank You father."

Least he could do. The royal party is soon brought into the Red Keep. Greeting you is the Queen Cersei herself, as beautiful as stories told of her but a savage cruelty seems to lurk there. With her is the most pompous shite you've ever had the misfortune of seeing, apparently your half brother Joffrey...the seven kingdoms are doomed....

With a tone as cold as the mountain winds the Queen greets the king and asks who this might be.

Psyckosama wrote:As far as names go it could be a lot worse...

Eddard the bastard comes to mind...

I'd like to make an agreement with her, her mother, and my father if they're open to it.

I know the women of her family tend to be shy on marriage, normally chosing to take lovers rather than husbands as to keep their independence.  

I'm extremely fond of Dacy and if it was at all politically reasonable I'd be sorely tempted to ask her to put that family custom to the side... but as far as reality goes I'd like to make the following arrangement for all of our sakes. If she should take with child as a result of our shared affections... I will recognize the child, and if they'll agree to it, I want to see that the child be honorably legitimized as a child of her house.

Basically if I was marrying only for love, I'd be totally smitten... but I have political duties and the most I can offer her is a place as the prince's paramour... according the Dorneish tradition, which actually does make it a rather high placed rank.

After some consideration all parties seem to be willing to live with this though Dacy does mention that politics aside outright marriage didn't sound so bad to her nor is she her mother or sister.

As for the rest, keep it discreet and for the gods sakes don't flaunt in front of marriage potentials!

3

The trip goes perfectly. Until you get to Pyke, the sullen hostility is palpable in the air and you get the feeling that Stannis's wrath is one of the few things keeping your ship from sinking with all hands lost. When you land you're NOT met by the Lord of Pyke but a drowned man, it turns out to be Aeron Greyjoy, Brother of the Lord of Pyke and the most prominent of all the Drowned men, the priests of the drowned god. While not exactly a snub, it is a bit...lacking... You're cordially greated by the Damphair and are lead towards Pyke. You not the gloomy and sullen demeanor of every Ironislander you come across. Almost like you're in a labor camp filled with Prisoners of war, and a war they think they didn't lose.

Brian Boru wrote:Eddard the bastard comes to mind...

As does Eddard the Userper...

After some consideration all parties seem to be willing to live with this though Dacy does mention that politics aside outright marriage didn't sound so bad to her nor is she her mother or sister.

I give her a kiss.

As for the rest, keep it discreet and for the gods sakes don't flaunt in front of marriage potentials!

Flaunt no, but they'll have to live with it...

The trip goes perfectly.  Until you get to Pyke, the sullen hostility is palpable in the air and you get the feeling that Stannis's wrath is one of the few things keeping your ship from sinking with all hands lost.

Heh.

When you land you're NOT met by the Lord of Pyke but a drowned man, it turns out to be Aeron Greyjoy, Brother of the Lord of Pyke and the most prominent of all the Drowned men, the priests of the drowned god.

I give him a traditional Ironman greeting. Am very polite but I make it clear that I bring a large amount of Violence with me. If you want some I have plenty.

While not exactly a snub, it is a bit...lacking...  You're cordially greated by the Damphair and are lead towards Pyke.  You not the gloomy and sullen demeanor of every Ironislander you come across.  Almost like you're in a labor camp filled with Prisoners of war, and a war they think they didn't lose.

Oh, I might have some ideas to brighten their moods.

Tell me, what did Robert think of my plans for the Step Stones?

If we have a moment to speak I ask Robert what we're going to do about the insult. He's king so its his call of course, but I'd like to humbly suggest that we 'assume' he's in ill health because why else wouldn't he greet his king, and subtitle imply that he's a crippled old man whose gone to seed.

One thing I do discuss with Dacy is my plans for Asha. I had them before we met, but now that I have her by my side I can't in good conscience enact them without her permission.

Basically I intend to seduce the hell out of her and use her as leverage to ideally have some control over her family, or at least have an ear in their inner court. I need some leverage over them, and between earning young Theron's loyalty and seducing Asha, I could pretty much get both Balon's heirs under my thumb...

I also discuss my intentions for them. On the whole, the Ironmen are a vile lot of disgusting barbarians... and will remain so until we can figure out a way to tighten their bonds to the rest of the kingdom... but in the end that also means that if you can lead them by the nose they're also a very useful deniable, and in the end disposable, asset...

Brian Boru wrote:You can feel the waves of HAAAAAAAAATEEEEEEEEE coming off of Cersei.

Robert then calls you in front of him, he declares you the champion and gives you the prize of 1000 gold Dragons.  Then he asks if he could learn the identity of the mystery knight.  He knows that tradition allows you to deny him that but satisfy his curiosity if you could.  EVERYONE leans forward to hear and see your reaction.

Huh, really? Someone knocked out the Mountain? Shiny.

"Your Majesty, if you will, there is a gift I would like to offer first. Or, I suppose, only half of it is a gift. The other is returning something to its rightful owner."

I have my 'squire' fetch Robert's hammer, wrapped in the golden shadowcat fur, and offer up the bundle as I take knee in front of the King.

... and rather than saying anything pithy there, I take the moment after he's unwrapped it to stand, and remove my helmet.

"I am Gabriel Stone, a knight of the Vale."

... this'll be good.

Brian Boru wrote:


Least he could do.  The royal party is soon brought into the Red Keep.  Greeting you is the Queen Cersei herself, as beautiful as stories told of her but a savage cruelty seems to lurk there.  With her is the most pompous shite you've ever had the misfortune of seeing, apparently your half brother Joffrey...the seven kingdoms are doomed....

I'll need to play this smart, i need to reveal the queen's infidelity to get Joffery away from the throne.

With a tone as cold as the mountain winds the Queen greets the king and asks who this might be.

I bow in greeting to the Queen.
"My name is Aliser your Majesty, The King has taken me into his service after learning of my performance in a battle against Mist-men."

Psyckosama wrote:As does Eddard the Userper...

Eeee...that to.

I give her a kiss.

She returns the kiss, which, if you're along to...other things.

Flaunt no, but they'll have to live with it...

Kinda expected with some men.

I give him a traditional Ironman greeting. Am very polite but I make it clear that I bring a large amount of Violence with me. If you want some I have plenty.

He nods respectively and leads you to Pyke, on the way he actually mentions that he aught to thank your uncle, it was because of him that his eyes were opened and he entered the service of the Drowned God.

Oh, I might have some ideas to brighten their moods.

Tell me, what did Robert think of my plans for the Step Stones?

Let them vent their spleen, though Balon will inevitably be insulted by implying of being an attack dog.

If we have a moment to speak I ask Robert what we're going to do about the insult. He's king so its his call of course, but I'd like to humbly suggest that we 'assume' he's in ill health because why else wouldn't he greet his king, and subtitle imply that he's a crippled old man whose gone to seed.

Aeron twitches at that but says that his brother was merely preparing to greet the king and his retinue.

One thing I do discuss with Dacy is my plans for Asha. I had them before we met, but now that I have her by my side I can't in good conscience enact them without her permission.

Basically I intend to seduce the hell out of her and use her as leverage to ideally have some control over her family, or at least have an ear in their inner court. I need some leverage over them, and between earning young Theron's loyalty and seducing Asha, I could pretty much get both Balon's heirs under my thumb...

She stares at you like you're out of your gourd, she'd likely bite something clean off if your tried. Besides she wouldn't be surprised if Balon had deemed Theon dead in his eyes, the bastard IS that spiteful about things.

I also discuss my intentions for them. On the whole, the Ironmen are a vile lot of disgusting barbarians... and will remain so until we can figure out a way to tighten their bonds to the rest of the kingdom... but in the end that also means that if you can lead them by the nose they're also a very useful deniable, and in the end disposable, asset...

Other's have tried and failed horribly.

When you make it to the Main hall of Pyke, the weathered piece of hard driftwood that is Balon Greyjoy is there to greet you, at his side is a girl roughly your age, dark hair cut short but pretty in a pointy sort of way though she wears man's clothing. She has the same utter distaste for your group as her father though she seems to blink in your general direction for just an instant, what exactly the emotion was you can't tell.

Old Balon bobs his head and greats you, apologizing for not being there personally but he was still busy preparing Pyke to recieve you, he also introduces Asha, "My only child left to me after my...past actions." Too proud to say mistakes but not stupid enough to put his rebellion in a positive light.

Rieverre wrote:Huh, really? Someone knocked out the Mountain? Shiny.

Loss on points.

"Your Majesty, if you will, there is a gift I would like to offer first. Or, I suppose, only half of it is a gift. The other is returning something to its rightful owner."

I have my 'squire' fetch Robert's hammer, wrapped in the golden shadowcat fur, and offer up the bundle as I take knee in front of the King.

... and rather than saying anything pithy there, I take the moment after he's unwrapped it to stand, and remove my helmet.

"I am Gabriel Stone, a knight of the Vale."

... this'll be good.

There is utter and dead silence...no one speaks or even breaths it feels like.

People stare at you and many move closer to get a better look at you. Aside from green eyes you're almost a carbon copy of King Robert when he was a young man.

Then finally... "My son...little Gabe's come back..." Robert quietly says, remembering his first child, even if bastard born. You swear there are tears there.

That silence begins to break as people begin to mutter among themselves. That low mummer is shattered by the most hate filled shriek of rage you've ever heard in your life.

If you thought Cersei was furious before, she's downright inhuman and bestial now in her rage, she calls you bastard, usurper, assassin, and is shrieking for someone to kill you again. No one is moving this time which raises her fury all the higher. But her rage is cut short when Robert, with a wordless roar twists around and with a fist that looks more like a ham slams it into Cersei's face, shattering her nose, cheekbones, and jaw with a sickening crunch. She goes airborne and tumbles down to the bottom of the stand, still alive but insensate.

Robert is stomping down the stairs utter murder in his eyes, "YOU WILL NEVER SAY THAT AGAIN!" Everyone else is too stunned to speak.

Silver Sun 17 wrote:I'll need to play this smart, i need to reveal the queen's infidelity to get Joffery away from the throne.

Considering your mother was blonde and slight...it might help.

I bow in greeting to the Queen.
"My name is Aliser your Majesty, The King has taken me into his service after learning of my performance in a battle against Mist-men."

She actually laughs at that claim, more likely the little boy managed to stick his knife into a dying wildman after the proper knights (you get the feeling that proper means not bastards) finished the job, and if you want to lie than you need to at least make sure they're believable ones. Other members of the King's Guard are also there.

Brian Boru wrote:


Considering your mother was blonde and slight...it might help.

Still need to either find a fuck up on her part or to get to make a mistake.

She actually laughs at that claim, more likely the little boy managed to stick his knife into a dying wildman after the proper knights (you get the feeling that proper means not bastards) finished the job, and if you want to lie than you need to at least make sure they're believable ones.  Other members of the King's Guard are also there.

"I understand your Reluctance to believe my claims Your Majesty for i would suspect the same if I was in your position, but I speak the Truth. I slew 30 Mistmen and the leader of that group in a single battle as my master and others who fought in that battle can attest to."
If any of them are near i glance at them gesture a request for them to speak up.

Brian Boru wrote:Eeee...that to.

Yeah.

She returns the kiss, which, if you're along to...other things.

If we're not alone we get alone rather quickly.

Kinda expected with some men.

Yeah, but I do nothing in halves. Even with other women I'd probably frighteningly attentive.

Advantage of a perfect memory. Never forget anything.

He nods respectively and leads you to Pyke, on the way he actually mentions that he aught to thank your uncle, it was because of him that his eyes were opened and he entered the service of the Drowned God.

I nod. "I'd like to say Stannis would be pleased to hear that, but while my uncle is a good man, he's also as hard and unyealding as the Iron from which you take your name."

Let them vent their spleen, though Balon will inevitably be insulted by implying of being an attack dog.

He's a Bannerman. He bent at the Knee. The sooner he accepts that, the sooner he'll go from being a pain in the arse who's kept on a short leash like a rabid dog, to being able to profit directly and live that life he's always wanted. Raping and pillaging according to the Old Ways.

Aeron twitches at that but says that his brother was merely preparing to greet the king and his retinue.

Well, I was trying to keep the volume down... :p

She stares at you like you're out of your gourd, she'd likely bite something clean off if your tried.

I'll be careful.

 Besides she wouldn't be surprised if Balon had deemed Theon dead in his eyes, the bastard IS that spiteful about things.

I know.

Other's have tried and failed horribly.

Others have put in half-efforts. There have never really been any attempts to bridge the gap.

When you make it to the Main hall of Pyke, the weathered piece of hard driftwood that is Balon Greyjoy is there to greet you, at his side is a girl roughly your age, dark hair cut short but pretty in a pointy sort of way though she wears man's clothing.  She has the same utter distaste for your group as her father though she seems to blink in your general direction for just an instant, what exactly the emotion was you can't tell.

I smile at her and turn the charm up to 11. "M'lady."

Roguish smile!

Old Balon bobs his head and greats you, apologizing for not being there personally but he was still busy preparing Pyke to recieve you, he also introduces Asha, "My only child left to me after my...past actions."  Too proud to say mistakes but not stupid enough to put his rebellion in a positive light.

I let Robert take the lead, though I am shockingly friendly and mention that I believe the Iron Throne has done something of a historical disservice to the Iron Men. The Iron Islands havebeen long forgotten on the Mainland. Even the name "Seven Kingdoms" is disrespectful. It's my hope to forge a stronger, closer, much more... mutually beneficial relationship with his people.

Brian Boru wrote:There is utter and dead silence...no one speaks or even breaths it feels like.

People stare at you and many move closer to get a better look at you.  Aside from green eyes you're almost a carbon copy of King Robert when he was a young man.  

Then finally... "My son...little Gabe's come back..."  Robert quietly says, remembering his first child, even if bastard born.  You swear there are tears there.

That silence begins to break as people begin to mutter among themselves.  That low mummer is shattered by the most hate filled shriek of rage you've ever heard in your life.  

If you thought Cersei was furious before, she's downright inhuman and bestial now in her rage, she calls you bastard, usurper, assassin, and is shrieking for someone to kill you again.  No one is moving this time which raises her fury all the higher.  But her rage is cut short when Robert, with a wordless roar twists around and with a fist that looks more like a ham slams it into Cersei's face, shattering her nose, cheekbones, and jaw with a sickening crunch.  She goes airborne and tumbles down to the bottom of the stand, still alive but insensate.  

Robert is stomping down the stairs utter murder in his eyes, "YOU WILL NEVER SAY THAT AGAIN!"  Everyone else is too stunned to speak.

On one hand, I should probably be taken aback ... but she'd been screaming orders to have me (and probably Mya, were she aware) killed.

... well, at least he didn't smack her with the hammer.

I can think of a number of ways out of this, each more awkward than the last, but only one has the benefit of not making it look as if I'm overstepping.

"Father, please," I say, stepping up beside Robert. Hopefully, it's loud enough to get through to him but not loud enough to carry. "Not in front of Mya."

Oh, Stranger, I hope that does the trick of calming him down at least a little. And it's factual too, since my 'squire' hasn't gone far after delivering the bundle of cat fur and hammer.

Silver Sun 17 wrote:Still need to either find a fuck up on her part or to get to make a mistake.

True

"I understand your Reluctance to believe my claims Your Majesty for i would suspect the same if I was in your position, but I speak the Truth. I slew 30 Mistmen and the leader of that group in a single battle as my master and others who fought in that battle can attest to."
If any of them are near i glance at them gesture a request for them to speak up.

"Then you wouldn't mind giving us a display of your skills right?" The one you KNOW is Jaime speaks up.

Psyckosama wrote:If we're not alone we get alone rather quickly.

Heh

Yeah, but I do nothing in halves. Even with other women I'd probably frighteningly attentive.

Advantage of a perfect memory. Never forget anything.

Heh, some might call that smothering.

I nod. "I'd like to say Stannis would be pleased to hear that, but while my uncle is a good man, he's also as hard and unyealding as the Iron from which you take your name."

He nods at that saying little else the rest of the trek.

He's a Bannerman. He bent at the Knee. The sooner he accepts that, the sooner he'll go from being a pain in the arse who's kept on a short leash like a rabid dog, to being able to profit directly and live that life he's always wanted. Raping and pillaging according to the Old Ways.

Good luck with that.

Well, I was trying to keep the volume down... :p

Heh

I'll be careful.

OOC: You'd stick your dick in a hornet's nest if it were shaped like a woman dude....at least from what I can tell from your character.

I know.

Then what do you plan if he has given up Theon for dead?

Others have put in half-efforts. There have never really been any attempts to bridge the gap.

Why would you want to? She honestly wouldn't shed many tears if the islands sank into the ocean one fine day. A WHOLE LOTTA historical gripes there.

I smile at her and turn the charm up to 11. "M'lady."

Roguish smile!

And with that the hate, loathing, and disgust ratchet up to 12, and, as far you can tell are utterly honest with no other emotions whatsoever.

I let Robert take the lead, though I am shockingly friendly and mention that I believe the Iron Throne has done something of a historical disservice to the Iron Men. The Iron Islands havebeen long forgotten on the Mainland. Even the name "Seven Kingdoms" is disrespectful. It's my hope to forge a stronger, closer, much more... mutually beneficial relationship with his people.

The coversation is much more cordial than you would have expected, but Robert makes it utterly clear that he crushed him once and he can and will do it again if need arises, and the only reason he is even here and not leaving Balon alone to stew in his own hate juices is to show him his new son and heir and to show that the boy is just as strong as he was if not much stronger and DON'T FUCK WITH THE STAGS. This is the gist he WAS a bit more cordial.

Balon looks like he wants to murder the both of you and Asha actually reaches for the knife that isn't there. But neither does anything...untoward. Balon is more cordial with the two of you and Asha ratchets down the hate waves, though only intensity NOT sincerity.

A feast is announced that night to honor the king and his son. You have a few hours what do you do with them.

Rieverre wrote:On one hand, I should probably be taken aback ... but she'd been screaming orders to have me (and probably Mya, were she aware) killed.

... well, at least he didn't smack her with the hammer.

I can think of a number of ways out of this, each more awkward than the last, but only one has the benefit of not making it look as if I'm overstepping.

"Father, please," I say, stepping up beside Robert. Hopefully, it's loud enough to get through to him but not loud enough to carry. "Not in front of Mya."

Oh, Stranger, I hope that does the trick of calming him down at least a little. And it's factual too, since my 'squire' hasn't gone far after delivering the bundle of cat fur and hammer.

Astoundingly that seems to have worked, he blinks for a moment then looks around for his daughter. "Mya's here?"

Mya removes her hood and cap and shows her long hair and storm blue eyes. "Yes, I am here."

Robert stares at the both of you, memories from a long time ago seem to bubble to the service.

He then snaps his eyes back to Cersei, still out cold. "Guards, take her to her quarters, and call a damn Maester, GODS I NEED A DAMN DRINK!" He mutters something about Tywin spitting mad. The only Tywin you can think of being Tywin Lannister the father of the Lannister twins.

He turns to the two of you asking if you have anyplace that you are staying, if not then he invites you to stay with him at the red keep as guests of honor.

Mya seems for it, what do YOU think?

Brian Boru wrote:

"Then you wouldn't mind giving us a display of your skills right?"  The one you KNOW is Jaime speaks up.

"I would not mind at all."

Brian Boru wrote:Heh, some might call that smothering.

Another advantage of it is you also know their limits and can work around them.

He nods at that saying little else the rest of the trek.

I just add in I'm at least pleased he found his path.

Good luck with that.

Yeah... *sigh*

OOC: You'd stick your dick in a hornet's nest if it were shaped like a woman dude....at least from what I can tell from your character.

Are you kidding me?

Lets see... who have I slept with?

First, the 7 whores sent to me who frankly I didn't have much of a choice in the matter. Robert basically sent me them with an order to get laid.

Then Myranda, my character's childhood sweet heart who he'd probably have married on the spot if it was politically realistic and who is always going to be very close to his heart... and by that I mean he's going to want to take her as a paramour.

Then the Umber Girl who pretty much make it clear that 'No' was not an option.

Finally, Dacey who to him is his perfect woman whom he's already asked to be his paramour.

So no, he will NOT bang just any old serving girl. There has to be a connection.

Then what do you plan if he has given up Theon for dead?

Attend the Kingsmoot with my friend and bring a barrel of saltwater. Drowned every single motherfucker who doesn't jump in line behind him.

Why would you want to?  She honestly wouldn't shed many tears if the islands sank into the ocean one fine day.  A WHOLE LOTTA historical gripes there.

"Nor would I. To be honest, if they rebel on my watch they'll look back fondly to the gentle end that Stannis would have granted them. My hopes are either to get them intigrated into the kingdom as productive members of society or to completely destroy their culture by burning the forests, banning the worship of the Drowened God, relocating their small folk to the mainland, and stranding the nobility on the islands without ships or servants."

And with that the hate, loathing, and disgust ratchet up to 12, and, as far you can tell are utterly honest with no other emotions whatsoever.

I look amused if anything.

The coversation is much more cordial than you would have expected, but Robert makes it utterly clear that he crushed him once and he can and will do it again if need arises, and the only reason he is even here and not leaving Balon alone to stew in his own hate juices is to show him his new son and heir and to show that the boy is just as strong as he was if not much stronger and DON'T FUCK WITH THE STAGS.  This is the gist he WAS a bit more cordial.

And I was extremely polite.

Balon looks like he wants to murder the both of you and Asha actually reaches for the knife that isn't there.

When she does my look changes from amused to... well... ever have the angel of death look into your soul and find you lacking? One of those moments.

But neither does anything...untoward.  Balon is more cordial with the two of you and Asha ratchets down the hate waves, though only intensity NOT sincerity.

They're alive. Of course they don't.

A feast is announced that night to honor the king and his son.  You have a few hours what do you do with them.

Well for one, I want to speak with Asha. Politely.

Brian Boru wrote:Astoundingly that seems to have worked, he blinks for a moment then looks around for his daughter.  "Mya's here?"

Mya removes her hood and cap and shows her long hair and storm blue eyes.  "Yes, I am here."

Robert stares at the both of you, memories from a long time ago seem to bubble to the service.

He then snaps his eyes back to Cersei, still out cold.  "Guards, take her to her quarters, and call a damn Maester, GODS I NEED A DAMN DRINK!"  He mutters something about Tywin spitting mad.  The only Tywin you can think of being Tywin Lannister the father of the Lannister twins.

 

"With that reaction and the blonde hair, people might be uncomfortably reminded of the Targaryens," I say, considering the queen.

He turns to the two of you asking if you have anyplace that you are staying, if not then he invites you to stay with him at the red keep as guests of honor.

Mya seems for it, what do YOU think?

"That would be welcome, especially as part of the reason we came as we did were assassins waiting for us on the road," I say, indicating, the hoods and my own concealing helmet. "Twice over, the first a party of sellsword knights, the second killers in the night burning an inn down around us and lurking outside with bows."

"Granted, we came out of those encounters their betters and not without certain dividends," I knock the knuckles of my gauntleted hand against my armor's cuirass, "but the Red Keep is certainly preferable to a tournament tent in the field."

"And we did come here to meet our father again," I finish with a smile.

Silver Sun 17 wrote:I would not mind at all."

Jaime Lannister then draws his sword and shield and offers a light spar to test your abilities.

If you accept, roll a d10

Psyckosama wrote:Another advantage of it is you also know their limits and can work around them.

True

I just add in I'm at least pleased he found his path.

"grunt"

yeah... *sigh*

Heh

Attend the Kingsmoot with my friend and bring a barrel of saltwater. Drowned every single motherfucker who doesn't jump in line behind him.

Well that's certainly one way of dealing with the issue.

"Nor would I. To be honest, if they rebel on my watch they'll look back fondly to the gentle end that Stannis would have granted them. My hopes are either to get them intigrated into the kingdom as productive members of society or to completely destroy their culture by burning the forests, banning the worship of the Drowened God, relocating their small folk to the mainland, and stranding the nobility on the islands without ships or servants."

She frankly hopes for the latter and would lead the charge if it happened and tells you so the next time you're alone.

I look amused if anything.

The paint begins to peel off from the walls behind you.

And I was extremely polite.

Might want to bend a steel bar or juggle a few tables otherwise he might not take the hint.  

When she does my look changes from amused to... well... ever have the angel of death look into your soul and find you lacking? One of those moments.

She actually goes bone white at that.

They're alive. Of course they don't.

Heh

Well for one, I want to speak with Asha. Politely.

You manage to find her practicing throwing her throwing axes, a common hobby in the Iron Islands both in war and in peace.

When she notices you she bows respectfully and asks what brings you here with the same respect, seems that scare earlier knocked some more manners into here.

Rieverre wrote:"With that reaction and the blonde hair, people might be uncomfortably reminded of the Targaryens," I say, considering the queen.

The king actually makes a joke about how they all look so much alike, they mistake 5th cousins for 1st cousins more often than is healthy. Certainly crude but considering what else has happened today....

"That would be welcome, especially as part of the reason we came as we did were assassins waiting for us on the road," I say, indicating, the hoods and my own concealing helmet. "Twice over, the first a party of sellsword knights, the second killers in the night burning an inn down around us and lurking outside with bows."

"Granted, we came out of those encounters their betters and not without certain dividends," I knock the knuckles of my gauntleted hand against my armor's cuirass, "but the Red Keep is certainly preferable to a tournament tent in the field."

"And we did come here to meet our father again," I finish with a smile.

You saw hot fury, now you see cold fury and to be honest, you can't tell which is more terrifying. He promises that these assassins will be hunted down and put down like the dogs they are as swiftly as is possible.

Then with that you and Mya are brought back up to the Keep with you and your half-brother Joffrey, who could win awards for petulant sullen shits what with his face and his general demeanor, as the guests of honor.

Anything you want to try to say to your brother on the ride up, who is convincing you more and more by the minute that the only king he's going to be better than is the Mad King himself.

Brian Boru wrote:

Silver Sun 17 wrote:I would not mind at all."

Jaime Lannister then draws his sword and shield and offers a light spar to test your abilities.

If you accept, roll a d10

rolling

The member 'Silver Sun 17' has done the following action : Dice Roller

'd10' : 10

Brian Boru wrote:True

You can be just as attentive and affectionate as they want from you.

Well that's certainly one way of dealing with the issue.

"As the saying goes, when in Valyria..."

She frankly hopes for the latter and would lead the charge if it happened and tells you so the next time you're alone.

"I have no love for them to put things gently but I'd rather not commit genocide."

The paint begins to peel off from the walls behind you.

The amusement grows.

Might want to bend a steel bar or juggle a few tables otherwise he might not take the hint.  

That'll come soon.

She actually goes bone white at that.

I look into her goddamned soul.

And the warning is, don't fuck with me. I'm polite. That doesn't mean I'm soft.

Though Balon does get the same aura of menace after this... I'm still polite but obviously unimpressed by his daughters foolishness.

You manage to find her practicing throwing her throwing axes, a common hobby in the Iron Islands both in war and in peace.

When she notices you she bows respectfully and asks what brings you here with the same respect, seems that scare earlier knocked some more manners into here.

Good.

I casually ask if I can see one of the axes and give it a go myself... then I throw the axe hard enough to split the goddamned target and bury it in the wall behind it.

"Good balance."

And then wrench it out of the stone and gently return it, a charming and gentile smile on my face.

At this point I turn up the charm.

"Believe it or not, I do get it," I state calmly. "Why your people are so... resentful. In many ways we're much a like. To most the Iron Islands are the Bastard Kingdom of Wersteros. The one that on a good day they like to pretend doesn't exist and on a bad they'd like to see sink beneath the waves, taking all of its inhabitants with. I've been there. I've done that. I could show you the scars."

I let that sink in. "Of course not without reason. You are a brutal culture of violent and relentless sea raiders who only think a mans worth is measured by what he's wrenched from the dead hands of another. Of course you to have your reasons as well. These islands are the most hostile stretch of land south of the wall. This isn't a land for the soft. Only people as hard as iron can survive here. I respect that."

"And I understand the origin of your resentment. You were at the very height of your power when Aegon conquered Westeros. And he didn't even do it by force of arms, in respectful battle. He flew by and set you on fire from the back of the hell spawned offspring of the Storm God and an idiot iguana. And then he striped you of your conquests, of lands hard won and set you back on these blasted rocks like a grand fucking penal colony, then promptly forgot about you for the next two hundred odd years while you stewed in your own resentment. I get it."

I look at her. "But unlike my predecessors I do not intend to neglect the Iron Islands. These lands have been forgotten for too long and need to be brought into the fold. I'd like to do so in a manner that makes the better of both of us. You were raised in the Old Ways, but the fact is, following the old doesn't mean a rejection of the new. In fact I believe the two can be complementary. You just need to be more... selective of your targets. Though we'd have to work out the question of geography, I do have a couple ideas..."

My smile here is downright vicious. She probably knows what I'm thinking. It's the same kind of smile her uncles probably get when they talk about raiding

I shrug. "But in the mean time I do have something with me that will if not alleviate, than at least moderate the problems for the time being. I discovered a new crop, one that will thrive even here. I know your father is too proud and too focused on the old ways to take it, but you... I think you're a bit more willing to act covertly to do what needs to be done to benefit your people."

Note: assume I do let her get her part in edge wise.